


Damn good to be alive

by Amelia_Ponds_Glasses



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abandonment, Abbadon, Alex - Freeform, Anger, Blood, Demon Dean Winchester, Family, Hell, Love, Sadness, Winchester - Freeform, sam and dean - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-15
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-06-02 10:53:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6563368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amelia_Ponds_Glasses/pseuds/Amelia_Ponds_Glasses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alexandra Patterson is a normal girl, with a normal family.<br/>Well that's what  She thought<br/>Until the Winchester are sitting at her kitchen table.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Alex woke up, Sun beating in her window, birds chirping annoyingly loud, and the sound of people walking and talking. She sat up in her bed, yawned and rubbed her head. "Doesn't my family sleep?" She asked irritated. She threw her blankets off of her and swung her feet over the side of her bed. She walked over to her small mirror and looked at herself. Her long, black, loose curly, hair was a mess, sticking up in places, falling in her large grey eyes. Alex had light brown skin, she wasn't skinny, but nicely shaped, and she was five foot eight inches, "Not too bad." She said, picking up a hair brush that sat on her nearby desk. She quickly brushed her hair and then pulled it back into a pony tail. She was still in her pajamas, a blue under shirt, and a pair of soft pajama shorts. She walked over to her window and looked outside. She watched the trees sway in the gentle breeze of south Carolina, her horses grazed, and her border collie, Banshee, barked loudly. Alex looked harder, snatched her blue glasses off her nightstand and looked again to see what Banshee was barking at; a boy, at least fourteen, was climbing one of her family's Apple trees, and failing miserably. She threw a plaid shirt over her undershirt and pulled on her brown boots and ran out of her room. "Dad! Hey dad!" She yelled as she made her way to the kitchen. "Dad there's a boy climbing-." She stopped dead as she was greeted by, not only her parents sitting around their kitchen table, but a man with dark hair, and a boy, with dirty blonde hair and green eyes. "Oh... hello." She said, slowly, giving an awkward wave. "Morning, Hon, we didn't want to wake you. This is John Winchester. John, this is our daughter, Alexandra." Said Alex's father, Mr Jacobson. Alex took a few steps closer, smiling slightly. "It's nice to meet you, Alexandra." Said the dark hair man, John. "That was my boy, Sam, climbing those trees. I told him not to get into much trouble. He barely listens." He gave a small laugh. "Right. Well, that's fine, I was just afraid he would hurt himself." said Alex, then she added under her breath. "Or the apples." She smiled quickly. "Yes. Oh, and this is my other son, Dean." Said John. "Hello." She said. Her eyes fell on Dean, he looked at her, gave a quick smile, and a small wave. Alex watched him for a minute, he didn't seem to want to be there at all. "Well, I'm going to go put some proper clothes on. Then, when I get back out, why don't Dean and I go see if we can't collect Sam?" Suggested Alex. Dean looked up, abruptly. "Yes." He said quickly. "Great." She said. Then Alex left the kitchen and as soon as she rounded the corner she began to run to her room. She slammed the door behind her, and dug through her drawers. She pulled out a pair of jeans and pulled them on. She rummaged through closet and grabbed a pair of her dad's old muck boots, she pulled them out, then walked back to the kitchen. "Alright. Let's get going, Dean." She said, smiling. "Right." He said, flatly, he pushed his Apple pie away from him, stood up and walked over to her, he followed her to the back door. "You're gonna need to switch your shoes." She said. "Why?" He asked. "Because if you don't it ain't gonna be apple pie stuck to your shoes." She said, smirking. Dean groaned and took off his sneakers and replaced them with the boots Alex handed him. "Where did you say Sam was, Alexandra?" Asked Dean. "Uck, don't call me Alexandra. Call me Alex, or Al." She said. "Alright. Where's my brother, Al?" Asked Dean. "Over here." She said, pointing towards the field where the horses were. "Great." Said Dean, eyeing the ground. "Thats why you're wearin' boots, handsome." She said, smirking. "Oh, flirting, are we Al?" Asked Dean, grinning. "Oh please." She said, rolling her eyes. "I wouldn't be surprised, chasing after an older guy." He said. "I'm seventeen dumbass." She replied. "Really?" He asked, staring at her. "Well... I will be next month." She said. "Ah, I'm eighteen. I win." He said. "Hmm. So tell me, did it take time to be this obnoxious, or were you born like this?" She asked, smiling. "Your just a barrel of sass aren't you?" Dean replied. "I got loads more from where that came from, darlin'." Alex said. Dean didn't respond, he just kept walking. "Stumped Ya?" She asked. "Hmm?" Asked Dean. "I couldn't hear you over the sound of my awesome comeback." Alex scowled. "All right, city boy." She replied. "I'm not from from the city, country bumpkin." Said Dean. "Yeah? Then where are you from?" She asked. "No where... and I suppose everywhere." He said. "You move?" She asked. "Yeah. Haven't stayed in one place longer than a month since I was four." He said. Alex looked at him. "My mom died when I was four. And dad became a... traveling salesman, so we have been all over." Alex, frowned. "I'm sorry, Dean." She said, quietly. "Yeah, thanks." He said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "My sister died when she was eleven." Said Alex. "You don't have to tell me. Chick flicks aren't really my thing." Said Dean. "Shut up. We're just talking, I ain't gonna need a shoulder to cry on. So don't flatter yourself, hot stuff." She said, scowling. "Anyway, she...Well, she went on vacation with my parents. It was a horrible accident. My parent's car was hit by a drunk driver, my dad's leg got broken, and my mother was in a coma for a month. But my sister... Well I'm sure you get the rest." Said Alex, staring at the ground, avoiding the large piles of horse manure as she walked. "I'm sorry." He said. "Well don't be. It's not your fault. Besides, life happens." Said Alex. "Yeah." Said Dean. "Dean!" Yelled a voice. Alex looked up and saw the brown haired boy running towards them. "Sammy, what's-?" Sam ran right past them. "VAMP!" He yelled. Dean's eyes widened, he grabbed Alex's hand and began to run back towards the house. "Dean! What's going on?" She asked. Suddenly her dog, Banshee, came running past her at top speed, barking like a maniac. "Wait, did he say vamp!? As in vampire!?" Asked Alex. "Yes, no time to explain, we need to get you to your house." Said Dean. He began to run ever faster. "But Dean... don't vampires have super speed?" Asked Alex. "How hasn't it caught us?" Dean didn't answer. Sam was already in the house, Dean flung open the back door, he slammed it and bolted the locks. "VAMPIRES!" Yelled Dean. "We know, get into the bunker." Said John, he was holding open the door to the basement. "Wait, I thought you forgot the combination to the keypad..." Said Alex, to her parents. "We lied, now get down there." Said Mrs Patterson. Dean pulled Alex to the door, and they ran down the steps. "Dean... what's happening?" Asked Alex again, she was gripping his hand. "Your parents are something call hunters. They hunt the things that go bump in the night." Said Dean. "And so do I." Alex stared at him in disbelief. "What?" She asked, letting go of his hand, she backed up into a foam dummy and let out a shriek. "What the hell does any of this mean!?" She cried. Her father walked down the basement steps, Banshee in his arms, door locked behind him. "It means we are under attack. Take your dog, sweetie." Said Mr Patterson. "But why are we under attack?" She asked. "We somehow made enemies with a vampire long ago." He said. "Now she's found us, and she wants to kill us." Said Mrs Patterson. "And thats why we are here. To kill this bitch." Said John. "Sam too?" Asked Alex. "Yeah." Replied Sam, he was gripping a machete. "Oh my..." She muttered. Dean held out a machete of her own. "Whats this for?" She asked. "You gotta behead a vamp to kill it." He said. Alex gripped it by the handle. "Ok." She said, her voice had steadied. "I need some practice if I'm going to kill a vampire." She said. "We have lots of dummies in the training room." Said Mrs Patterson. "I'll teach you." Said Dean. "No. Sam can." Said Alex. Dean laughed. "Sam? I've been hunting for longer than Sam. You're better with me." He said. Alex raised her eyebrows. She turned to her parents. "It that a training dummy?" She asked, pointing to the foam dummy. "Yes, but it might be harder it's reinforced with-." Began Mr Patterson. But Alex gripped her machete hard and whirrled around her machete out. A second later the foam head was on the ground. "Reinforced with something that needs to be stronger." Mr Patterson finished. "Maybe I'm better on my own, hot shot." Said Alex, her wits now gathered. Dean smirked at her. "What?" She asked. "Nothing. Come on there's more to be taught." He said. He walked away, and disappeared behind a door, Alex followed him. "Ok, what else?" She asked. "Theres more than vampires. For one you gotta be able to shoot a pistol." He said, handing her a silver pistol that was hanging on the wall. "Its loaded?"she asked. "Yup. Now you need to unlock-." Before he finished talking there was four loud bangs. He looked at the target. "A heart shot, and three head shots." She said, smiling. "Alright. Your pretty good." He said. "But now you've got to be able to kill a demon." Alex sighed. "Those are real too?" She asked. "Yeah, sweetheart." He said. "Holy water." He said, handing her a small bottle. "What?" She asked. "It burns them, you've got to at least be able to slow it down." He said. "How the hell do I practice with this?" She asked. "Hmm... forget that, just keep the bottle." He said. She nodded. "Alright, ghosts, spirits, and entity's." He said. "You gotta torch their bones." She said, smiling. "How... how did you know that?" He asked. "I read." She said. "How can you slow one down?" He asked. "Iron or rock salt." Said Alex. He smiled again. "Alright." He said, then he walked behind another opened door. "Now what?" She asked gripping her machete. She followed him, suddenly the door slammed behind her, and then was surrounded by people with giant fangs. She swiftly decapitated every vampire she saw. She looked at the heads; no blood, and two dimensional. "Cardboard cutouts." She scoffed. "Wow." Came Dean's voice. Alex turned and saw him in the corner, smiling. "I knew I liked you." He said, before leaving her in the room, filled with decapitated vampires. Her grey eyes were wider than usual, and her cheeks burned. "What?" She asked after a minute. She turned and ran out of the room. "Dean, what did you-." She was cut off by a person lurching themself at her. The woman was tall, and Alex immediately noticed her fangs. She swung her machete. Miss. She swung again. Miss. "Once I got rid of your boyfriend I knew I just had to get you. Then your mommy and daddy." She hissed. "They will pay for what they did." Alex was backed into a corner, she slid down to the floor. "And now, you will pay too." She said. Alex smirked. "Think again, bitch!" Alex said. She. The vampire was close enough Alex kicked her feet out, pushing the vampire across the room, she fell backwards. Alex stood up, the second the vampire stood up Alex cut off her head. Her body dropped to the floor, and her head rolled away. Alex was covered in blood. She turned and saw Dean laying on the ground, his head bleeding. "No. No. No." She said, dropping her machete, and running to him. She dropped to her knees. "Dammit, Dean." She whispered, she pulled off her plaid shirt, and still in her undershirt she pressed the shirt to his head to stop the bleeding. She noticed his eyes flutter. "You're alive!" She exclaimed. "Yeah." He muttered. "Thanks to you." Alex scoffed. "Don't try to die again." She said. "No promises." He said. She rolled her eyes. "I hate you." She said. "I known you do, country bumpkin." He replied. "Dean!?" Yelled John. "Alex!?" Yelled Mrs Patterson. The training room door burst opened. "What the hell happened in here?" Asked Mr Patterson, looking around. "I killed your arch enemy, dad." Said Alex. "You killed her? You killed Paisley?" Asked Mrs Patterson. "Yes." Said Alex. "Now... tell me, did Paisley kill Juniper?" Asked Alex. "Yes. A car crash didn't kill your sister, that bitch did." Said Mrs Patterson, glaring at the decapitated vampire on the floor.  
That evening Sam, Dean, and John got into their black 67' Impala. "Alex." Said Dean. "Yeah?" She asked. Dean handed her a piece of paper. "Call this number if you ever need help." He said. "Who's number is it?" Asked Alex. "His name is Bobby Singer. He will help you." Said Dean. "Thank you." She said. "Bye Dean." She waved. "I'll be seeing you." Said Dean, giving her a smile.

"Hello?" Asked a voice. "Hiya Hot shot." Replied a cool, Texas accent. "Country Bumpkin. Long time no see." Said Dean. "Yeah, well I've had other things to do that hang out with a city slicker." Alex said. "Like?" Asked Dean. "Ghosts, ghouls, wendigo's, demons, Leviathans." She said, adding an extra pronunciation on the last word. "Whoa, wait, Leviathans?" Asked Dean. "Yes, do I need to reach through the phone and clean out your ears? I said Leviathans. Douse 'em in borax, Behead 'em and bury 'em under thirty feet of frickin' concrete." She said. "Nice." Said Dean. "Now there no doubt in my mind that you called to gloat, but say there was another reason?" Alex groaned. "Alright, ya caught me. There's a demon." She said. "And?" Asked Dean. "Her name is Abbadon." Said Alex. "What?" Asked Dean, sounding almost angry. "I want you to put away every file you have on her, burn them, throw the ashes in an ocean, and walk away." Alex couldn't help laugh at this point. "Ooh, don't was me ganking your girlfriend?" She asked. "Alex I am serious." Said Dean. "That maybe, but I'm set to hunt her tonight." She said. "Where are you?" Asked Dean. "Nebraska." She said. "Perfect." He said. "Wait what?" She asked. "Don't do anything, don't leave your hotel room, and don't even open a window. I'll be there by tomorrow." He said. "Dean-." She began. "Alex, just send me your address and listen to me for once." Dean said. "Alright." Said Alex. "Now sit back, and watch a pay-per-view chick flick or something." He said. "No Dean." She said. "Alright, then watch one of your sci-fi tv shows." He said. "Now ya got it, city slicker." She said. "Uh-huh. See ya." He said. "Bye." She replied, then she hung up her phone, texted Dean the address of her hotel, and picked up the TV remote. Alex was in a large red hotel room, two queen beds with black bed spreads, a flat screen tv, a soaking tub, a shower, and a decent sized, fully stocked refrigerator, and microwave. Alex turned on the TV to BBC and began to watch. "What are you going to do? Moisturize me?" Alex sighed. "Ahh re-runs." She said, happily.

11 A.M. the next morning.  
Alex hadn't slept that night, but then again how could she? There was a marathon of her favorite show on that night until the next. Alex had the TV up pretty loud. "Oh shoot! Don't turn right! You always turn right!" Exclaimed Alex as she watch the bow-tied man and his ginger companion take a right, again, while running from yet another alien. Suddenly the ginger companion screamed as they came face-to-face with the alien. "ALEX!" Yelled a voice. "ALEX!" Alex quickly muted her TV and picked up a gun she kept on the bedside table, she stood up, walked to the door, latched the chain, and opened the door about three inches. "Dean, Sam." Said Alex, as she stared at a dirty blonde haired, green eyed man, and his long, brown haired, hazel eyed, brother. She unlatched the chain and threw open the door. "Sammy!" Exclaimed Alex, staring up at him. "I always forget you're so frickin' tall, ya Sasquatch." She said. "Thanks Alex." Laughed Sam, giving her a hug. He moved out of the door, and revealed Dean, standing there, holding a gun. "You gave me a damn heart attack with that horror movie." Said Dean. "Horror-? Dean it was doctor who!" Laughed Alex. "What? Sammy, didn't you used to watch that?" Asked Dean. "Uh-huh." Said Sam, staring at the TV. "Wait is that the new doctor?" Asked Sam. "Uh, no, that's eleven, there is actually a new, new one." Said Alex. "Really? A twelfth? How?" Asked Sam. "Well-." Began Alex. "Hey geek." Said Dean. Alex turned around. "I didn't get a hug, thank you very much." Alex smirked. "Oh. I heard you had fleas." Said Alex. "But, I'll risk it." She said, walking towards the door. Alex gave him a big hug. "How ya been country bumpkin?' Asked Dean. "I've been partying with my friends. You know Harry, Hermione, Ron, the Doctors, and Sherlock." Said Alex, smiling. "Geek." Said Dean. "You not exactly social either, Mr Machete." Said Alex, pointing to the machete in his left hand. "Yeah, thanks." He said, letting go of her and walking into the room, Alex closed the door behind him. "Amelia, listen to me, it's very important, don't blink-." The TV turned off suddenly, Dean was holding the remote in his hand. "Oh, come on. I love the weeping angels." Groaned Alex. "Abbadon." Dean reminded her. "Alright, alright." Said Alex. "How do you even know about Abbadon?" Asked Sam. "We got some history, that bitch and I." Said Alex. "What? Let me guess, she wants to destroy humans or something?" Asked Dean. "No! She made it personal. She was the one who set the vampire on my family. She is the reason my sister is dead." She said, through clenched teeth. "Paisley." Scoffed Dean. "Yeah. My parents hunted Abbadon, so she got herself a guard dog. She killed Paisley's parents, and pegged it on my parents." Said Alex. "So now you wanna gank the bitch?" Asked Dean. "Hell yes." Said Alex. "Alright. I'll go get the supplies out of the car." Said Dean. "You'll help? Even though it's for revenge?" Asked Alex. "Absolutely." Said Dean. "Thank you." She said. Dean smiled at her and walked out of the room. "Alright Sam, I need your help." Said Alex. "With what?" Asked Sam. "I put I tracking chip on Abbadon last time, so I can keep my eye on her, kill her when convenient. And I need your help to access it." Said Alex. "Yeah, sure. I can try, have you got a computer?" Asked Sam. "Yeah, over on the table." Said Alex, pointing to the large, black, gothic styled table. "Wow." He muttered. He sat down and began typing on the computer. Dean entered the room again, holding a large duffle. "Holy water, machetes, guns, and bullets with devils traps carved into them." He said, as if reading off a check list. "Nice touch to the bullets." Said Alex. "Yeah. It keeps Abbadon in one spot." Said Dean. Dean put the duffle on the bed. "Uh, go through that. I gotta use the bathroom." Said Dean. "Ok, through those doors." Said Alex, pointing to the large black doors. Dean walked up the two stairs and through the doors, a second later he came back out. "You know there's a pool in here?" He asked, pointing back to the bathroom. "It's a soaking tub, Dean." She said, smirking. "It's a soaking tub, Dean." He mimicked, then walked back through the doors. Alex laughed quietly and sat back on the bed and pulled out a bottle of holy water. "Do you have the tracking number for the device?" Asked Sam. "Yeah, I wrote it on this paper." Said Alex, throwing a balled up scrap of paper at him. "Thank you." He said. Alex began loading bullets into her pistol when Dean came out of the bathroom. "Ready?" Dean asked her. "For?" She asked. "Lunch. Obviously. There is a great burger place a mile from here." Said Dean. Alex laughed at him but Sam scoffed. "We're working a case, Dean." Said Sam. "No, we're helping a friend. Besides, can't work on an empty stomach." Said Dean. "Dean, do you only care about food?" Asked Sam, obviously annoyed. "You know what the second you go a day without eating, come criticize me about food." Said Dean. "You are ridiculous!" Said Sam. "Stop it!" Exclaimed Alex, angrily. "Dean and I will get lunch, Sam stay here and try to track Abbadon." Said Alex. "Fine." They said, together. Dean grabbed his coat and left through the door. "Uh, Sam what do you want from the place?" Asked Alex, staring after Dean. "Dean will order for me, he knows what's best." Said Sam. Alex scoffed at him, then leaned down to be at eye level. "This attitude is going to get nothing done, Sam. I'll talk to Dean in the car." Said Alex, softly. "When I get back really hope you can come to an understanding." Then she grabbed her coat and ran out the door. "Dean!" She yelled. He turned and looked at her. She walked over to him and stared him in the eye. "You don't need to tell me who stole who's boyfriend, but I need you to put your claws away and get a grip. We are hunting Abbadon, and you can't run into this half cocked." She said, scowling. "Fine." He said, opening the car door and getting inside. Alex opened the passengers side door and sat down. Dean started the car, but didn't move. "Let's go." She said. He just stared ahead. "What's wrong?" She asked. "I tricked Sam into letting an angel posses him." Said Dean, quickly. "You what?" Asked Alex. "He was dying Al! What was I supposed to do?" Asked Dean, beginning to drive down the road. "Oh Dean..." She whispered. "The angel wasn't who he said he was, he tricked us, and killed our friend. Now he is working with Metatron, his second in command." Said Dean. "Alex, Sam was ok with dying." Dean said quietly after a moment. "Then you needed to let him die." Said Alex. "Then what? What do I do then?" Asked Dean. "Then you come to me, and I pick up your pieces and put you back together, like always." Said Alex. "Alex... He would have been gone for good, those pieces would have been too broken to put back together." Said Dean. "Then I would have kept you, chipped and all." Said Alex, smiling. Dean didn't answer, he just kept to driving. "Dean." She said. "Alex, I'm not in the talking mood anymore." He said. Alex didn't try to convince him to talk, she just let's him brood. After four minutes they arrived at a burger joint called 'Zonkos Burger Spot'. Dean and Alex got out of the car and walked into the restaurant. They ordered and sat down at a table. "So, tell me more about how you've been doing this past year." Said Alex. Dean stared at her for a moment with his green eyes, and furrowed eyebrows, then sighed. "Sam tried to complete the trials to close the gates of hell, but he couldn't, if he did he would die, but he was so close, he was in a coma. Gadreel possessed him-." Explained Dean. "Gadreel?" Asked Alex, here eyes wide. "Yeah. Why?" Asked Dean, looking a bit suspicious. "I had a run in with the son of a bitch last week. He tried to kill me." Said Alex. "Why?" Asked Dean again. "Because I attacked one of Metatron's angels. I had Gadreel backed against a tree and Metatron summoned him." Said Alex, her cheeks burning to think of her lost hunt once again. "You had Gadreel?" Asked Dean. "Against a tree?" Alex nodded. "Yes. And I was going to stab him up his damn angelic face." Said Alex, through clenched teeth. She relaxed a second later. "So, what about Abbadon? What do you have against her?" Asked Alex. "It's my fault she's even here right now. I had beheaded her, then put her damn head back on, and she got up and walked away." He said. Alex looked at him in surprise. "Well, basically." He added. "And?" She asked. "Well, she's named herself 'Queen of Hell' and is trying to kill us, more or less." Said Dean. "So, I have you figured out how to kill her, yet?" Asks Alex. "Um... no, not yet." He said, his eyes landing on the waitress bringing their food. "Here you go, darlin'." Said the waitress, setting down the food. Dean stretched his arm to help the waitress set down the food, and Alex saw it. There was a red mark, peeking out from his sleeve. As soon as the waitress left Alex grabbed his arm and held it up. "Hey!" Said Dean. Alex pulled back his sleeve and scowled deeply at him. "The damn mark of Cain! Really Dean?!" Asked Alex, angrily, practically throwing his arm away from her. "It's only way you can kill a knight of hell!" He said, defensively. "And the first blade?" Asked Alex. "Crowley is looking for it." Said Dean. "Crow-. CROWLEY!?" Hissed Alex. "You're working with Crowley? You are a bigger idiot than I thought!" Exclaimed Alex. "Alex, I did what I had too." Said Dean. "Dont you know what that can do to you? You will need to kill Dean, not only will you need to, you will love it. And the urge just gets stronger and stronger." Said Alex. "Alex, I know what I know what I bargained for!" Said Dean, seemingly frustrated. "Dean, I don't think you do. This mark will ruin your life." Said Alex, her voice now quiet and filled with fear. "Alex it was my decision. What do you care?" Asked Dean. "What do I care? What do I-? Dammit Dean. I lo-." Suddenly her phone rang, she ignored it for a second, then sighed, answering it, and putting it on speaker. "What did you find, Sammy?" Asked Alex. "Oh, sorry Sam's a little tied up right now. I can take a message." Said a cool female voice. "You bitch!" Alex yelled. "Oh, so you recognised my voice did you, country girl?" Asked Abbadon, over the phone. "Hell yes! And when I find you, I will make you wish you never crawled out of that hell pit!" Said Alex, fiercely. "Oh, this one's got fire, keep her around... Dean." Said Abbadon. "I swear to god, bitch, if you hurt my brother I will kill you." Said Dean, through clenched teeth. "I like your girlfriend better, put her back on the phone." Said Abbadon, in an almost whiny voice. Alex picked up the phone and put it off speaker. "Hello gorgeous." Said Abbadon. "I am going to cut your tongue out, you bitch!" Yelled Alex. "Now tell me where you are so I can follow out on that threat!" Abbadon chuckled lightly. "With pleasure, we are in an abandoned warehouse, original, i know." Said Abbadon. "What warehouse?" Asked Alex, angrily. "Oh, well, that's more clear. I am in the old toy factory on the other side of that stupid little town your in." Said Abbadon. "Well I'm coming to find you, because if you mess with my family, you mess with me, and darlin' that ain't a thing you want to do." Growled Alex. "Oh, are we flirting-?" Alex hung up and slammed her phone onto the dashboard. "The factory on the other side of town." Said Alex. "What did she say?" Asked Dean. "I doesn't matter! Let's go!" Yelled Alex. Dean didn't argue, he followed Alex out of the restaurant, to the car, he tore out of the parking lot and drove 85 MPH down the street. "We need to stop at the hotel." Said Dean. "Why?" Asked Alex, fiercely. "All our weapons are there." Replied Dean. "Dammit. Fine just hurry." Said Alex. They made a sharp turn into the parking lot of the hotel and ran through the door and grabbed their bags and weapons. "We need back up." Said Dean. "Thats why I'm here." Said a voice. Alex and Dean whirrled around. "CASS!" Yelled Dean, as Alex held her Angel blade to his throat. "Oh. Cass." says Alex, lowering her blade. "That reminds me, Alex, I need to tell my something, about something you mentioned a while ago." Begins Cass. "Cass, not now, Sammy's in danger." Said Dean. "I know." Said Castiel. "Where did you get that?" Cass asked, now looking at the angel blade Alex held in her hands. "I killed one of Metatron's angels and took it." Said Alex. Cass stared at her for a moment. "Impressive." Said Cass. "Yeah, I know. Now help us or get out of our way." Said Alex, picking up her bag and leaving the room, throwing it into the trunk of the car. They all got in the car, Cass in the back, and Dean began driving recklessly down the road. "How did you even find us?" Asked Alex. "I got a text from Sam saying he needed help, and an address. I figured it was a trap set by Metatron, but if Sam was really in trouble I had to come." Said Cass. "So whats happened?" Alex stared at her hands for a moment. "It's my fault." She said. "I called Sam and Dean to help, and I made Sam stay behind because they needed to stop fighting... and Abbadon must have come looking for me, but found Sam instead." Said Alex. "Abbadon?" Asked Castiel. "Yes." Said Alex. "How do you know of her?" Cass asked again. "She tried to slaughter my family, and got my little sister." Said Alex. "You know it's not your fault she killed Juniper, or took Sammy." Said Dean, gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles were white. "It is. I should have handled it alone." Said Alex.

"Are you sure this is where Sam is?" Asked Cass, as He, Alex, and Dean, crept down a long dark hallway, guns and knives in hand. "I dunno, why don't you asked them." Suggested Alex, pointing to the pile of dead demons behind. "Point taken." Said Cass. "What's the plan?" Asked Dean. "You two find Sam." Said Alex. Cass nodded and began to walk slowly farther down the hall. "What about you?" Asked Dean. "I'm going to kill Abbadon." Said Alex. "You can't! Only the first blade can kill a knight of hell." Said Dean. "Yeah, well then I'll go down fighting." She said, and she began to turn down a hallway when Dean grabbed her arm. "Dean, I swear if you don't let me go-!" She began to yell. "You listen to me. You be careful." Said Dean. "If you die-." Alex pulled him into a hug. "I won't." Said Alex, then she smiled to him and ran away from, down the hall. Alex put her gun in her pocket, and her Angel blade in her right hand. She suddenly heard walking feet, and saw two demons turn down the hallway and run towards her. Alex held her Angel blade tight, prepared to kill them. They got closer. "Oh can't you move faster? I'm bored." Said Alex, pretending to yawn. And as she said that the demons were gone, and some one was gripping her arm. "Thats more like it!" She said, whirling around, stabbing the one holding her captive, the body flashed and fell to the ground. Then she turned back, and the demon in front of her gripped her shoulders and plowed her backwards into a wall. "Getting handsy, are we?" She asked. The demon snarled at her. Her upper arm were pinned to the wall, but her elbows were free. The demon leaned closer, up to her face. "Abbadon is going praise me, for bringing her a new play toy." Hissed the demon. "I don't think so, sorry." Said Alex, as she dug the angel blade into the demons ribs, the body flashed and fell to the ground. She took a deep breath, then stepped over the bodies, and kept walking down the hallway. She looked into every door, but one specific door reeked of evil. She felt it in her mind saying 'Dont go in! Don't do it!'. Alex crept slowly towards that door, she gripped the handle, and slowly turned it. The door creaked open, and led to an empty room. Alex sighed, and looked to the left, then the right, and the left once more. Suddenly she jumped back. To the left of the room now sat two large armchairs, a small wooden table, holding a tea pot and two teacups. "Come sit down." Called a female voice. Alex watched as Abbadon walked across the room, towards her, wearing a long silver dress. "What are you doing?" Asked Alex, completely taken off guard. "Well, I thought we could talk." Said Abbadon. And before Alex could respond there was a pair of handcuffs on her wrists, and her Angel blade was gone. "How did-?" Asked Alex. "The queen of hell, sweetie." Replied Abbadon, snapping her fingers. Alex looked down and suddenly, like magic, she was wearing a long, flowing, white gown. "Are you taking me to the ball?" Asks Alex, annoyed. "Not quite. Follow me." Said Abbadon, walking back towards the armchairs. Alex, having no choice, seeing as she is prisoner, joins Abbadon. Alex takes a seat in an armchair and scowls deeply. "I want to talk." Said Abbadon. "And then, I'm going to slowly, and painfully kill you." Alex doesn't flinch, or weaken, she just keeps scowling. "That doesn't explain why I'm in this." Said Alex, gesturing lightly to her gown. "Darling, I'm the queen of hell, I can do what I want." Said Abbadon. "And I wanted to spice you up a bit." Alex now deepens her scowl into a glare. "Oh, come on. I'm not going to hurt you, not yet. We are just going talk." Said Abbadon, picking up a teacup filled with tea. "About?" Asked Alex. "Your sister." Said Abbadon, slowly. Alex's eyes widen, that topics is one of the very few things that weakens Alex. She quickly jumps up, but Abbadon flicks her hand, and Alex is thrown back into her chair. "PLEASE! I AM TRYING TO HAVE A CONVERSATION!" Said Abbadon, loudly. Alex practicality growls in anger at Abbadon. "Now," begins Abbadon, dishing sugar into her tea, then taking a sip. "I sent Paisley after your sister as a warning to your family. Paisley brought back her heart and handed it to me, and I crushed it. Your itty, bitty, baby sisters heart, in my hands." Said Abbadon, jeering at Alex. "Shut up!" Yelled Alex. "And then I sent Paisley back to finish the job. Your sister isn't buried in that coffin, your parents lied to you! There was nothing left of your sister! She was torn to shreds!" Yelled Abbadon. Alex jumped up and ran at Abbadon. She pressed her hands on her throat. "You bitch!" Screamed Alex, squeezing her throat. Alex looked into Abbadon's eyes, and then Abbadon began to laugh. Actually, genuinely, laugh. Then Abbadon flicked her finger and Alex flew backwards against a wall, her back hitting the wall so hard the wind was knocked out of her, and she slid to the floor. Abbadon stood and walked slowly to her. She reached above her, into mid air, and suddenly a pair of hanging handcuffs dangled from the ceiling. "Stand up." Said Abbadon. Alex didn't listen the just sat there. "I said, STAND UP!" Said Abbadon, raising her hand in an upward motion. And Alex was picked up off the floor like she was a rag doll. Abbadon locked the hanging cuffs onto her wrists over her previous handcuffs, and they dug into her wrists, but Alex showed no signs she was in pain. Abbadon turned Alex's angel blade over in her hand, staring at it. She brought the blade up to Alex's chest, and slowly dug it downwards, leaving a tear in her dress, and a cut about four inches long, and a pull of blood began to spread. "You. Will. Be. An. Example. To. Those. Winchesters." Said Abbadon, making another small cut on each word. Alex was grunting in pain. "You don't mess with the QUEEN OF HELL!" Yelled Abbadon, taking a long swing at Alex's arm. Alex let out a small squeal. Abbadon smiled, finally. "I'm going to tell you a story now." Said Abbadon, she went to sit in mid air, and she landed on a chair that appeared behind her. "Once, a long time ago, your mommy and daddy were hunting me, because they thought I was bad. Well, they were right. I was the worst. I killed their parents, and their grandparents, and I killed their children. But your mommy and daddy hunted me. I found them, I locked them up, and killed them. Then brought them back to life and killed them again. For a week I tortured them, and then healed them right up." Said Abbadon, smiling, as though reading from a book of fairy tails. "And then I set them free, they were only eighteen, and they lived for YEARS in fear, because I left them with three words carved into your daddy's chest. 'Its not over'. And they knew I would get them, and I did. And I got their itty bitty baby, June. And now I'm going to get you, slowly, and painfully." Said Abbadon. "You bitch!" Said Alex. "Me? No, that was your mom. I warned her, and she didn't care. She took your sister on that trip, she tried to make memories with her, because she knew she didn't have long, because I would find her. Your mommy was to much of a COWARD TO COME AFTER ME! SHE COULDN'T EVEN SAVE YOUR SISTER!" Yelled Abbadon. "Shut up!" Yelled Alex. "Its true. I know. You mommy told me I wouldn't ruin their lives. Well I did." Said Abbadon. "And I am sure your mom and dad are looking down at you, from hell, right now. Disappointed. It was a boneheaded move to come after me alone." Said Abbadon. Alex looked away from Abbadon. "Look at me, when I talk to you." Said Abbadon, standing up, and squeezing Alex's face. Abbadon cut a long line down Alex's torso. Her dress was covered in dark red blood. "Hmm. Now I remember why I chose white." Said Abbadon, staring at the fabric. Abbadon walked very close to Alex, face to face. "I remember doing this to your mommy. Just like you, she didn't scream for help, she was stubborn." Said Abbadon, then she stared at Alex's collar bone and began to dig the blade into it, it felt like she was drawing a design. Then Alex screamed. "Until I did this." Said Abbadon. Abbadon brought the blade away, and threw it to the floor, where it clattered loudly. Abbadon stared at her again. Then she drew her hand back and punched Alex in the face. "Aah!" Grunted Alex in pain. Abbadon struck her over and over, until Alex felt her eyelids start to close. Abbadon picked the angel blade back up and pulled it back as to stab her. "HEY BITCH!" Yelled a deep voice. Alex barely turned her head, and could just about make out a figure. "You leave her alone!" Yelled The voice again. "Dean." Muttered Alex. Abbadon looked at Dean for a second, and put her hand to her side. "Don't shoot." Said Abbadon, she reached up to unlock Alex, and Dean ran to her, catching her as she fell. Alex didn't look at him, but she felt him holding her tight, instead she was watching Abbadon. Dean wasn't watching her, and Abbadon pulled her arm up, and went to stab Dean with the angel blade. Alex used what she had left of her energy to push Dean to the floor. And the angel blade drove into Alex's chest, in inch, two, three, four. Alex toppled to the floor. Everything moved in slow motion. She watched as Abbadon smoked out, and she saw a tall figure come running from the door frame. And then she saw Dean. She saw his face over hers, he stared down at her, and slowly took her into his arms. There was no sound in any of this. She just watched as Dean silently mouthed words. Then suddenly, as though someone covered her eyes, she only saw black.

"Alex!" Called a voice. Alex shot up in bed, and stared around her room, she was in her room, in Texas. She saw the Apple orchards, and Banshee sitting at the end of her bed, asleep. Alex got out of bed, careful not to wake her. She walked around her room, staring up and down and left and right. She was home, she knew that, it was obvious, but she felt confused. Why? Suddenly her door burst open, and a small girl, eleven, dark skin, matching Alex's, jet black hair in long braids, and dark brown eyes, stood there smiling up at Alex. "Juniper." Said Alex, staring down at her eleven year old sister. She was she so shocked to see her? She saw her every morning, for the past week, and the same time, Juniper bursts into her room calling her for breakfast. Yes, that was right. "Don't you knock?" Asks Alex, not able to help but smile. "Sorry." Said Juniper, knowing Alex wasn't really all that mad. "What did mom make for breakfast?" Asks Alex. "Chocolate chip pancakes and sausage." Says June. "Yum. I'll get dressed an be out in a moment." Said Alex. Juniper smiled at her and walked out through the door, closing it behind her. Alex smiled to herself, and quickly got dressed. She opened the door and walked out. She could smell the sausage cooking on the stove, and Alex walked into the kitchen. "Morning sweetie." Said Mrs Patterson, smiling to Alex. "And Happy birthday!" Said Mr Patterson, holding out a stack of pancakes with a candle in them, and the number '33' written in chocolate sauce on it. "Oh thank you!" Exclaimed Alex. "We are just so happy you decided to spend your birthday with us on the ranch. It's been a while since we had a really family sit down." Said Mrs Patterson. "I'm happy I'm here too." Said Alex, taking a seat at the table. "But to be honest I had completely forgotten it was my birthday." Said Alex, beginning to laugh. "Well, we couldn't let you forget." Said Mr Patterson. "Of course not." Said June. Soon everyone was sitting at the table eating. "We had planned on going for a picnic later." Said Juniper, excitedly. "That would be lots of fun." Said Alex, taking a bite of sausage. "And we had decided..." suddenly their voices trailed off. Alex heard sirens ringing in her ears loudly, she stared out the window to look for an ambulance driving down the road. "Mom, was there an accident?" Asked Alex, still staring out the window. "What do you mean?" Asked Mrs Patterson. Suddenly the sirens stopped. "Huh?" Asked Alex, looking around at her family. They were all staring at her. "N-never mind." Said Alex, staring at her food. "Anyway, after breakfast we were thinking of going finishing." Said Mrs Patterson. "Great." Said Alex, still wondering why she was the only one who heard the sirens. Breakfast was over half an hour later, and Alex had decided to got get dressed. She sat on the edge of her bed, petting Banshee. Alex began to hum a song, 'carry on my wayward son' by Kansas. And suddenly she felt incredibly sad. But why? Why would she feel sad? It was just a song. Alex shook her head and stood up, opened her dresser and pulled out a pair of jeans and a pastel colored flannel shirt. She pulled off her shirt and began to button up her flannel shirt. "Alex!" Yelled a voice. "Hey! Oh, come on Alex." Said the same voice, quieter now. Alex couldn't help but jump, and she looked around, then raced to her door and opened it. "Dad! Did you call me?" Alex called down the hall. "No I didn't, hun." Said Mr Patterson. Alex closed the door. This time she couldn't shake the feeling something might be wrong, as she pulled on her jeans. Something wasn't right. It couldn't be. Was she losing her mind? She pulled on her brown boots and slowly crossed her room to the door. "Alex!" Yelled a voice again. Alex held her ears and dropped to the floor. "What the hell is that!?" She cried. "Oh, Alex, please." Whispered the voice again, clearly it was pained. Then suddenly the voice stopped. And it hit Alex like a brick wall, she stood up and stared around. "I'm dead." She whispered. "Oh. Oh my God I'm dead." She clapped her hands over her mouth. "None of this is real. Mom, dad, Jupiter." She muttered. "But Dean. Sam and Dean are real. I need to get back! I've got to." Said Alex. Alex ran out of her room, down the hall and towards the front door. She had to get out, any way she could. She flung open the front door, and then stumbled backwards. A green eyed, blonde haired man stood before her. "Hiya, country bumpkin." Said Dean, waving. "Dean." She whispered, staring at him. She rushed forward to hug him, but there was something blocking them from touching. "I'm not really here." Said Dean. Alex felt her eyes begin to well up. "D-Don't cry. I will get you out if this." Said Dean. "I'm dead, Dean." Said Alex. "I know. But you won't be for long." Said Dean. "No. Don't do anything stupid! Don't!" She cried. "I have to save you." Said Dean. "No. Shh." Said Alex staring at him through her teary eyes. "Just talk to me." She said. "W-why?" Asked Dean. "Because if you can't save me I want to hear your voice as I fade away." Said Alex, feeling horribly tired suddenly. "But that's not going to happen." Said Dean. "Just in case." Begged Alex. "Ok." Said Dean, he looked around the farm quickly. "I remember first meeting you. And the words that rushed through my mind. 'Oh my god, that girls is gorgeous.' And your voice was soothing, no matter what it is you said, even criticizing me, your voice just made me happy. Your smile, when you first smiled at me. You don't understand, Alex. It was the most beautiful smile I've ever seen." Said Dean, his sentence started off slow, but each word seemed to get easier to say. Alex knew she seemed emotionless in her face but her heart fluttered, as she leaned on the wall, and slid down it. She kept staring at Dean. "And Alex every time we worked a case I couldn't help but make a fool out of myself. Just to hear you laugh." Said Dean, his eyes stuck on you. He suddenly sat down, leaning against the door frame. "Oh please don't die." He said. Alex didn't say anything she just watched Dean through her slowly closing eye lids. "I-." She whispered, before her eyelids closed.

Alex gasped loudly, and sat shot up. "DEAN!" She screamed. There was the sound of chairs scraping and and feet running, Alex turned and saw Sam, Dean, and Castiel by her side. She was sitting on a hospital bed, in a small grey room. "Alex." Said Sam, staring at her. Alex reach up and pulled him down into a hug. "Sammy." She laughed. She let go of his and turned to Cass. "Castiel." She said, happily. He stuck out his hand but Alex pulled him into a tight hug. "I am happy you are alive." Said Cass. "Me too, Cass." Said Alex, letting go of him. Alex then pulled Dean into a hug. "Dean." Whispered Alex. "You're ok." he breathed, clutching her tightly. Alex sees Cass and Sam leave through the door, and Alex lets go of Dean. She holds his face in her hands, and pulls him into a kiss. He wrapped his arms around her neck. Then after a moment she lets go. "It's pretty damn good to be alive."


	2. Chapter 2

" _Thanks for saving me, Cass." I said, giving Castiel one last hug. "You are leaving, aren't you?" asked Cass, patting my back. I pull back and look at my boys, Sam, Dean, and Castiel. I sigh, "Yeah. Yeah, I am." I reply, giving them a small frown. "I'll miss you." says Sam, leaning down to hug me. I grip him tightly. "I'm gonna miss you too, Sammy." I say. I let go and turn to Dean. I smile faintly at him. "Ya gonna be alright?" he asks. "You can bet on it." I reply, chuckling. "What about you?" Dean smiled a bit. "You know me, I'm always alright." He replied. I frown they pull him into a hug. my head rests on him shoulder. "Call me if you need me, ok?" he says. "I know I will, Dean." I answer. I let go, and step back, staring at the three of them. I turn and open the door of my black pick-up, I hoist myself inside, and smile at them. "See ya." I say. They say good bye, and I start my truck and drive away. I'm on the road again, by myself, how it should be. I can never stay in one place for too long, because trouble seems to find me.  
_

 

 

I am sitting alone at the bar, book in hand, and beer next to me. I pick up my phone and check the time, its 5:30. "Oh, I gotta go." I mutter, getting up, and putting a ten dollar bill on the counter, under my bottle. I put my book into my bag and make my way out of the dark building, through the front door, and into the slowly dying sunlight. I check my phone again, typing in an address to the GPS app. My shoulder hits someone elses shoulder as I walk down the wooden stairs towards my truck. "Sorry." I murmur, looking up. I drop my bag to the ground, and I stare, opened mouthed. "You said you would call!" I yelled, shoving Dean into a wooden post. "You never called! You never answered!" There's hands on shoulders, and I'm thrown to the floor from behind. I grunt as I ram onto the floor. "Hey!" I hear Dean's voice yell. I look up, my nose is bleeding, I try to wipe it with my sleeve. "Alex-." Begins Dean. I get off the ground and pick up my bag. "Go away." I say, beginning to walk back to my truck again. "Al!" Yells Dean, running after me. I ignore him. "Alex!" He says again. I whip around and stare at him, my face hard, my cheeks boiling. "I told you too call!" I practically scream. "I know, I know, but I couldn't. I didn't have time." He says. I let out an offended squeak. "You could have made time! I don't have another goddamn person in the world Dean!" I roar. "I know, but I couldn't I didn't..." He didn't finish, he stopped talking as my eyes grew to the size of tires. Crowley walks up behind him. "I told you not to work with him." I say, quietly. "I told you something bad would happen." Dean, doesn't respond. "What? Now you suddenly can't talk because I found you out?" I ask. He still doesn't say anything, he just stares at me. I scoff, throw open the door of my truck, and get inside. "Go to hell." I say, and start the engine, and tear out of the parking lot. I go to turn on the music and realize my hands are shaking like leaves. I don't think I've ever been so infuriated in my life. I pull out my phone and dial Sam's number, again, hoping he'll pick up. When I get voicemail I cuss and throw my phone to the floor of my car.

 

I flop down on the hard hotel bed, groaning, and rubbing my eyes. I'm trying to convince myself I didn't really see Dean, that i was just drunk. But I wasn't, I only had one beer, and I'm no lightweight. I put a pillow over my face and scream into it. I can't believe after all this time, years, that i see him again. He didn't call, text, email, or even write. For a while i tried to call, and call but there was never any reply. I had gotten news that Abaddon had been killed, but I didn't know if Sam and Dean survived killing her. I call Sam everyday, hoping to get a reply, but there is never one. I still can't believe i saw Dean. Usually i would be thrilled, but i am furious. Two years. It's been two years since I've heard anything. Last i saw them, Dean was promising me he was going to me alright. And he isn't, he obviously isn't. I pick up my phone again, stare a it, then call Dean. It rings, then there's a click, and a voice. "Country bumpkin." Says Deans voice. "Shut up, Jackass." I reply. "Alright." He replies. "I want answers, now. So, get over here, or else I'm going to need to hunt you down." I say. "Where are you?" He asks. "The only hotel for the next fifty miles." I answer, then i hang up, and wait.

Ten minutes later theres a knock on my door. "Its open." I say. The door opens, and Dean comes in. He looks odd, different. I am leaning against the table, glaring at him. He opens his mouth to talk, i don't let him. "I hate your hair." I say, gesturing to his hair, which now has an odd part, and a swoop. He looks at me. "Well, I don't like your hair cut." He says. "Good." I answer. My previously long, curly, black hair, is now short, curly, black and navy blue hair. "I didn't cut it for anyone but myself. But i have a feeling that hair gets the girls." My eyes narrow into slits. Dean, just stares at me, then takes a step forward. "Its good to see you." He says, quietly. "Well, I'm glad your happy." I respond. He seems a bit taken back. "What happened to you?" He asks me. I sputter for a moment, before walking towards him. I'm inches from his face. "I got corrupt." I answer. "Meaning?" He asks. "Things happened Dean, things that changes me, literally." I say. "I got turned. Into a vampire." His eyes widen a bit. "I was a thing. One of the things that killed my family. I was so overridden with guilt i almost killed myself, Dean!" I begin to yell. "I called you, and called you! But you never answered! I needed your help, Dean!" I push him into a wall. "I put a machete to my throat, but i stopped. Not because you saved me, because I knew this is what Abaddon would have wanted, so i found Garth, and he helped me turn back." i stared at him green eyes. "You failed me." I hiss. I step back, and lower myself into a chair, glaring at him. "Do you want to tell me why you failed me?" I asked. "No. I don't." He answers. "Get out." I say. "Alex-." I jump up. "GET OUT!" I roar. I pull out my gun, before I can stop myself, my hands are shaking as I grip it. When I realized I've just pulled a gun on Dean I take a shuddering breath and drop it to the ground.

He walks to the gun, picks it up, and puts it on the bed behind me. "You couldn't have killed me anyway." He says. "If it bleeds you can kill it." I whisper, not needing to talk any louder than that, because he is just inches from me. "Not me." He insists. "What makes you so special?" I ask. He pulls up his sleeve, and I stare at the mark of Cain. "Oh. You still have it." I say, reaching out and touching it. "Doesn't Sam know how to get rid of it?" Dean gives a cold laugh. "Maybe, but he doesn't know where I am." Says Dean. "Why not?" I ask, suspiciously. "Because I didn't tell him." He answers. "What is going on with you?" I ask. He closes his eyes, then opens them. Black. I gasp, and trip over my bed, I fall over It, onto the floor. "What the hell?!" I yell. I jump up, and stare at him. "Get out of him, you black-eyed son of a bitch!" I yell. "Alex, Its me. I am a demon. There isn't anything in me. Its just me." He says, his head is facing the floor, but his eyes are looking up at me. "What happened?" I ask, walking up to him. "I was dead, and the first blade saved me, it turned me into a demon." He says. "Saved you? You're a demon. It didn't save you, it corrupted you." I say. "But I'm not dead." He insists. "You might have been better off that way." I whisper. Then, for the first time in years, I see it, legitimate hurt in his eyes. "You're a thing. And I can't cure you." I put my hand on his cheek. "You need to leave. Now." I say. "But Alex-." He says. "I can't trust you. Not now." I say. "Alex-." He tired again. "If you truly once cared about me, walk out that door." I say. "Okay." He whispers. "Okay." He takes a step back, and turns towards the door. I watch him open the door, but he stops halfway out, "I do really care about you." Then he leaves. I drop to my knees, my head hanging. I just lost the last person in the world I love. I drag myself off the ground, and in a rage of fury I hit the glass lamp, and it falls on the floor, shattering to bits. I grab my car keys, and leave right away, leaving my suitcase behind. I don't care about it, I'm leaving, not sure where, but I'm never coming back.


	3. Chapter 3

My cellphone ringing wakes me from my long sleep. I grope for it on the nightstand, and pick it up, hitting the button to answer it. "Hello?" I ask, groggily. "Alex." Says a voice. I sit shot up, in my bed, my heart begins to race. "Sam." I say. "Hi. I have some news, but you're going to want to come down to the bunker." He says. "You're calling me, now?" I ask, my voice rising. "Sam, its been three years!" I roar. "I know, I know, and I'm sorry, but I didn't know how to tell you-." I cut him off. "That Dean is a demon?" I ask, flatly. "What? You knew?" He asks. "Yeah. I ran into him two months ago." I answer. "Why didn't you tell me?!" Ask Sam, angrily. "You have no reason to be mad at me, Samuel! I tried to call you everyday since I left the hospital, and you ignore me! So, if anything I should be taking your hide!" I yell, into the phone. "Okay, I'm sorry." He says, softly. "Besides, I did call you, you didn't answer." I say. Sam sighs. "Why didn't you answer?" I ask. "I didn't know how to tell you about Dean." He says. "And before that?" I ask. "We were going through a lot, and Dean and I both agreed not to drag you into it, so... we blocked your number." Says Sam. "You idiot." I reply. "I was loosing my mind Sam! I needed you guys! I got turned into a Vamp! I almost ganked myself!" There is silence. "Good thing I have _Garth_ on speed dial." I groan. "I'll be at the bunker in an hour or two, I'm in Kansas, I was working a werewolf case." I say, then I hang up before he can reply. I get out of bed, and rummage through my suit case.

The last three years had been really hard for me, they changed me. I thought I had lost everyone, finally, my sister, mom, dad, and then Sam and Dean, I had minimum contact with Cass. I thought I was finally alone in the world, and that threw me through a loop, then down a deep, dark, rabbit hole of chaos. I stopped hunting, starting drinking more, then I forgot everything I was before. I forgot the geek I was, and I threw out my books, graphic t-shirts, all my DVD's. I became some bad-ass bitch. When I finally got back into hunting, I killed, and killed. I shot first and asked questions later. And then, I got turned. After that, I lost it, I went bezerk. I locked myself in a hotel room, miles and miles away from any civilization, and more importantly, humans. After months of solitude, and killing a rabbit once a week I finally called Garth, begging for help. He came right away, changed me back, and took me back to him family. They were all kind to me, werewolves. For the first time in a year, I didn't feel the impulse to kill. I stayed with them for about a month, before I dug myself into a ditch again, and left. I went right back to killing. I wasn't me anymore. I wasn't that quirky, clumsy girl, who couldn't go anywhere without her deathly hallows bracelet, anymore. I was different, I was cold. I was dark. And I still am.

I found my clothes, grey t-shirt, leather pants, leather jacket, and high heeled, black boots. I grabbed my angel blade, put it down my boot, picked my truck keys off my bed, and left the hotel room. I got into my truck, turned on the engine, and drove. The music was blaring through the speakers, and a Guns and Roses song faded out. Suddenly I was caught completely off guard. _Carry on my wayward son. There'll be peace when you are done. Lay your weary head to rest. Don't you cry no more._ The song began to blare through the speakers. I slam my hand down on the power button of the radio. Not that song. Never that song. That song used to hold my greatest memory, it just holds pain, and resent now.

 

 

_I lean against the hood of the Impala, age 18, Dean next to me, 20 years old. We are listening to the radio, outside the hotel we are staying in. John is in Deans room, and Sam in mine. We all just got back from a very successful hunt. Dean is in a particularly good mood. We aren't really talking all that much, just listening to the music. and filling our lungs with the cool night air. Its October, 23rd, a special day. My birthday. I turn 19 in three minutes. I see Dean check his watch again. "11:42." He reports. "Good." I reply. The music stops for a moment then "Carry on my wayward son" By Kansas starts. "This is my favorite song." I remark. "Why?" Asks Dean. "Dude, its a classic." I reply. He smiles at me. "What?" I ask. "Nothing." He replies. "Dean," I whine. "I know that look. What's so funny?" He doesn't stop smiling. "There isn't anything funny." He insists. "Then what, hot stuff?" I ask. He is grinning like mad now. "I remember when you first called me hot stuff, you barrel of sass." said Dean. I chuckled. "Well I had reason, you thought you were all that. And you still do." I reply, smiling. "Still?" He asks. "Uh-huh." I reply. "You don't think I'm all that?" Asks Dean. "Well, not all of it." I reply, smiling. "So, some of it, then?" He asks. "Maybe a bit more." I answer. "Oh, flirting now, are we?" He asks. "Yes." I reply, before I can stop myself. "Does it scare you?" I ask, smirking. A smile flits across his face. "Not in the least." He answers. Dean reaches for my cheek, and leans in. I stare at his bright green eyes, I can hear the music blaring in the background. Then I realized more than anything I wanted to feel his lips on mine. And just as the longing became unbearable, our lips met. There was an electric current running through my body, I was on fire. I swung my arms around Dean's neck, and pulled him closer. The kiss ends when the song does, and Dean leans back to his original position. He clears his throat. "Good song." I comment, before we both burst out laughing, like lunatics._

 

I don't listen to the radio again, for two hours. When a song comes on that reminds me of my past I try to block out music for good, but I never can.                                                                                                When I reach the bunker I grab two guns, and my jacket, that I placed on the seat next to me. I slipped on my jacket, and put my guns in my holsters. When I bang on the large metal door of the bunker, Sam answers it. When he sees me he looks absolutely shocked. "What happened?" He asks. I groan. "Sam, I didn't just drive two hours to talk about how I've changed." I snap. "Alright. I have good news." He says. "What is it?" I ask. "I've found Dean." He says. I just stare at him, he is obviously expecting a bigger reaction. "And?" I ask. "Well, I might have found a way to turn him human." Says Sam. "Okay, and why did you call me?" I say, rolling my eyes. "I though-. Well... Alex! It's Dean!" Says Sam, exasperatedly. "Sam you're not getting the message; I don't care." I say, before I turn away. "I might have to kill him." Sam says quickly. I freeze in my step, and slowly turn back to him. "Why?" I ask. "If the blood purifying ritual doesn't work, I might have to kill him." Says Sam, quietly. "I need your help, Alex." I stand, my mouth open. "Why?" I ask. "I cant do it by myself." Says Sam. I sigh. "Ok, I'll help." I say, walking in through the door. Sam closes the door behind me. "He's worse than ever." Says Sam, as he leads me down some metal steps. "How so?" I ask. "Just... not Dean." Replies Sam. "Wow. That's helpful." I say, sarcastically. I look around, seeing shelves and shelves of books in a giant room ahead of us. "Wow." I say again, in a totally different tone, its awe. "There's Alex." Comments Sam, smirking. "Shut up." I say, rolling my eyes. "Deans in the dungeon." Says Sam. "Why do you have a dungeon?" I ask. "It came with the place." Replies Sam. "That doesn't mean you have to use it." I reply, exasperated. "Well..." I sigh. "Shut up." I say again. Sam leads me past the giant library, into hallways, turning left and right, and walking down stairs, until Sam and I reach a large metal, door and Sam opens it. The second I enter the room lines with filing cabinet that line the walls, I realize there's a chill about the room. My body gives and involuntary shake, and I stop dead in my foot steps when I hear the tune. The tune that often haunts me on the radio, my daydreams, and my sleep. "Mm-mn." I moan. "No, Sam. I can't." I try to get back to the doorway, but I freeze once more. "Alex." Calls Dean's sing-song voice. I begin to shake. But my feet turn back toward the voice, and I walk forward. I can see, quite plainly, the filing cabinets before me slid sideways to create a passage. I grip the cabinet, and pull it back. I see him, then. He is tied to a chair, handcuffed, and in the middle of a devils trap, he looks just like he did last time I saw him. I stare at him. "You look terrible." I say, flatly. "You don't." Replies Dean, barely glancing at me. "Shut up." I say. He looks up at me with his big green eyes. "Why are you here?" Asks Dean. "I was summoned." I answer. He chuckles. "You're saying that to a demon?" He comments. "I wish I wasn't." I reply. "Why not? Its nice in here." Says Dean. "Because if I knew you were cured I wouldn't be fighting the impulse to slap you, because you aren't in your right mind." I snap. "You're still bent on that abandonment crap?" He scoffs. "No. I'm not. I'm stuck on the fact you let yourself get turned into a damn demon!" I yell. "It's better then being some girl whose still hung up on her child-hood crush, and just cant let him go, so she locks herself up and mopes." Replies Dean. "That's not the problem." I reply, through gritted teeth. "Oh, I see. You cant get over the fact you don't have a family anymore. Sam and Dean have gone and left, what about your-. Oh that's right. They're dead." He says, leaning forward. I draw my arm back, and slap him flat across the face. He grunts, and there is a red patch on his face, right where my hand had been. "You shut the hell up about my family, you black-eyed bitch!" I yell, then I storm out, past Sam, and out into the hallway. I navigate myself back in through the hallways, and into the library. I grab a book off the shelf, and fling myself into a chair.

 

Twenty minutes later I hear Sam's foot steps approach, and I set my book down, and turn to look at him. "How's Dean?" I ask. "Fine. He keeps shouting profanity at you, hoping you'll be able to hear." Replies Sam, pouring himself a drink, then offering me one. I take it and drain it quickly. Sam sits down in a chair. "What are you reading?" He asks. "A book on witches." I reply. He leans forward and reaches for the book, I slam my hands down on it. He gives me a look. "Its Harry Potter isn't it?" He asks. "Shut up." I reply, very gently throwing the book on the floor. "So...Dean?" I ask. "Uh, I've been giving him human blood, it should turn him back into a human..." His sentence drops. "But?" I ask. "Its not guaranteed." He says. I sigh. "Sam." I groan. "I know. I know. Its not looking up or down right now." He says. There is a good five minutes of silence, before Sam says "Are you hungry?" I shrug. "I guess." I reply, not all that hungry, but hoping Sam will leave. "I'll see what we have in the kitchen." Says Sam, getting back up, and disappearing. I get out of my chair, and pick up the book. I sigh, staring at it. This is just one of the pieces of my past I can't let go of. The Winchesters being the other.

 


	4. Chapter 4

"You've called Cass, right?" I ask Sam, as I hand him a plate of eggs, and toast. "Yeah, I called him yesterday." Sam replied, taking the plate. "Well, when will he be here?" I ask, sitting my self in a chair, across from him. "Maybe a day or so." Says Sam. "Good." I reply. I take a bite of toast. "Did you give Dean a dose today?" I ask. Sam shakes his head. I stand up, and brush my hands off. "I'll give it to him." I say. "No. You don't have-." I put my hand up. "I can do it, Sam." I say. "Ok." Replied Sam, looking up at me. I pick up my leather jacket, put it on, and leave the kitchen. I walk through the library, in twisty halls, and down stair cases. Until I come to the metal door again, for the second time in the week I've been in the bunker. I push the door open, and enter the dark room, the walls lined with filing cabinets. I pull back a wall of filing cabinets and I see Dean again. "Still hanging out with Sammy I see." Says Dean, his head hanging limply. "Still a demon I see." I reply, walking over to the cooler filled with blood. Dean chuckles. "Remember when you were weak?" He asks. I fill a syringe with blood. "You know, I don't." I reply. "I do. You were, maybe, 29, in love, a fool." Says Dean. "I don't seem to recall." I reply, holding out his arm. "Really... Come on, Alex. Think hard enough." Says Dean. I ignore him, and he begins to hum the tune again. I plunge the syringe into his arm, and give him the blood. I pull the syringe out, and he gives a loud chorus of demonic grunts. "All I remember is you, doing everything you can to bring me back to life, then you leaving me in a hotel out of love." I reply, throwing the syringe on the table. Dean chuckles. "What?" I ask, scowling at him. "You believed that? You are dumber than I though." He says, smirking evilly. "That's not you, Dean." I say, quietly. "It is me, sweetheart. Its 100% me." Says Dean. "Ok. I'm sure it is." I answer, sarcastically. I lean against the table, and we stare at each other. He keeps humming. "Stop." I say. He suddenly halts the tune. "Scare you?" He asks. "Yeah." I answer. "Dude, its a classic." Says Dean in a tone that resembles my own. I roll my eyes. He keeps humming the tune. "I can't wait till your back to normal, and I can slap you." I mutter. "Is that a promise?" He asks. My eyes narrow at him. "Shut up." I say. I leave, slam the filing cabinets, and walk out the door.

"I'm gonna go give Dean his second dose." Says Sam, looking up from a book about demonic possession, at 12:00 P.M. "No. I will." I say, getting up quickly. "Alex," Begins Sam. "I don't think its a good idea you do this." Saya Sam. "I'm fine Sammy. I haven't slapped him again." I say. "Alex-." I sigh. "Sam! If I can't do it I'll tell you." I say, rolling my eyes, then walking away. When I reach the dark room, I don't hear anything, I don't hear his humming or anything. "Dean?" I call. I hear a grunt, and I press forward, enter the devils trap. Dean's head is lolling down, his forehead is covered in sweat. I fill a syringe with blood, and stick him with the needle, when I pull it out he looks up at me with his black eyes, and lets out loud demonic grunts again. "You could be killing me!" He yells. "No. I could be killing a demon." I reply, scowling at him. "So that's it? As long as I'm still black-eyed you don't give a damn?!"  Exclaims Dean. "No I don't! Because I would be killing a monster! And that's what I do!" I yell back. "You would kill me?" He asks. I realize I'm leaning over, arms on either side of him, inches from his face, sneering. "Yes." I hiss. "Really? If it came down to it, you would stab me?" Asks Dean. "Yes. I wouldn't be killing Dean Winchester, I would be killing the disease." I reply. He chuckles. "You find this funny?" I ask. "Yeah, I do, sweetheart." He answers. "I don't." I reply, straightening up. He looks at me, his eyes staring up and down. "You've changed more than I realized." He says. "Well aren't you just broken to bits." He says, the he blinks and his eyes turn black. "I dare say you're more corrupt than myself." He says. "A demon, even." I glare down at him. "You're the demon." I reply. "Yeah, but you could give me a run for my money." He says. "Are you saying I'm the monster?" I ask. "No, But you just did." He points out. My eyes widen at him. "Shut up." I say. "No, really, just think about it. Shoot first ask questions later, reckless, aggressive, angry, murderous." He says, as though reading from a list. "We're the same." He says. I let out a shrill laugh. "Except one thing, we can cure you." I say. Dean smiles at this sentence. "And this is you forever?" He asks. "Yeah." I answer. "Yeah it is. I'm ruined." Then I leave, but not before one last glance at the hard-faced, cold-hearted monster, that consumed Dean Winchester.

 

I am in the library, reading Harry Potter and the goblet of fire, Sam went downstairs to give Dean his third dose fifteen minutes ago, and there is complete silence. I can't help thinking back eleven years ago, when it was just Dean and myself, hunting alone. Sam was at collage, John would disappear for weeks on end, and Dean would wake up everyday and throw a newspaper clipping at me, and tell me we had a case to work. And just like that, we would leave whatever crap hotel we stayed at that week, and get on the road. Those are the days I miss. The days I knew nothing would harm us other than a ghost, or a vampire. There are so many memories I've locked away, but these aren't one of them. I smile weakly. Suddenly there is a crash in the distance, and I look up from my book. Jump a foot, and grab the angel blade that sits next to me. "No." I mutter, my eyes wide. "Oh, yes, country bumpkin." Replies Dean, looking at me from the doorway. "How did-?" I begin. "The more blood you gave me, the more human I became, the cuffs came right off, and I just strolled over the devils trap." He says. "Dean... Please, just go back downstairs. I want to change you back. I want to have you back." I say, quickly, standing up. "You didn't seem to before." He hisses. "I was hurt, and angry! I didn't know what to do!" I insist. Dean scoffs. "P-please." I beg. "Just let me finish the treatments. Let me bring you back." Dean moves closer, and I move back. "Dean." I whine. "I don't want to hurt you." I grip the angel blade tightly. "Then don't. Just let it happen. You've died before." He says. "Dean, I want to save you!" I cry. "I want you back!" He steps at me, and swings a hammer at my head, I dodge it, and begin to run. I clutch angel blade for dear life. I run and run, then I find myself in a hallway, and run through a metal door, and slam it behind me, locking all the locks. I realize I can't hear him any more, just the sound of my breathing. Where did he go? Is he tricking me? I stand in silence for five minutes before the lights go out, and turn back on, but red this time, there is an alarm blaring. I finally decide to look out side, and then I yelp. "CASS!" I exclaim, seeing Castiel's blue eyes looking at me. "What's going on, Alex?" Asks Cass, looking around. "Dean's out, he's gone crazy." I reply. Then I see a girl with brown hair standing behind him. "Is this Hannah?" I ask. "Yes." Replies Cass, pushing the door open. I walk out, then Cass starts down a hallway. "How did you know who I am?" Asks Hannah. "Oh, Castiel told me, in the minimum contact that we had." I reply, quickly, looking franticly for a sign of Dean. "Oh." Muttered Hannah. I hear loud banging from somewhere. "This way." I whisper, pointing to my left. I turn the hallway, and begin to run, I can hear Castiel and Hannah following me. "It sounded like-." I am cut off by Cass running ahead of me. I see Castiel wrap his arms around Dean from behind. Dean grunts, and yells. "Dean, its over. Its over." Says Cass. I drop my knife, and run forward, I see Sam, who looks relieved, sad, and shocked. Then I turn, and see Dean, collapsed on the floor. "We've got to get him tied up, before he wakes up again." I say, trying to pull him up. Castiel grabs him by the arm, and hoists him over his shoulder. "Be careful." I say. "I know." Says Cass. 

We stand around Dean, still unconscious, tied in a chair, in the middle of a devils trap.  I am standing behind Dean, pulling the syringe out of his arm, then back up, putting the syringe on the table. "What the hell are we doing to him?" Sam asks aloud. "I mean, even after we gave him all that blood, he still said he didn't want to be cured, that he didn't want to be human." I sigh, and stare at Dean, my eyes suddenly becoming wet. "He's got to come back." I whimper. "Well.... I see his point." Says Cass. "You know, only humans can feel real joy, but also such profound pain." I chuckle lightly. "Yeah... no kidding." I say. "And, I can understand, more than anyone, this, being the way that takes no effort, is easier." I exchange a look with Sam, and blink my eyes, holding back my tears.  Suddenly Dean stirs. I unscrew the top of a flask, holding holy water. He looks up, eyes pitch black, then I watch as the black dissolves, leaving only his bright green eyes.  Dean groans and shakes is head. "You look worried fella's." Says Dean, looking up at Cass and Sam. I splash water on Dean from behind. Nothing happens. Nothing at all. Then I move around the front of him, and he looks up at us, he looks completely shocked. Cass and Sam exchange a look. "Welcome back, Dean." I laugh, dropping the flask, and pouncing on him. Cass moves forwards, and unties Deans hands. His hands instantly clamp around my back. I laugh hear him laugh in relief. "You're back." I whisper. "Yeah. I am." He replies. I couldn't be more happy than I am in this moment.


	5. Chapter 5

I wake up, and roll over in my bed. I smell the all too familiar smell of a hotel, but this time it makes me happy, because in the room across from mine is Sam and Dean Winchester. Its been two days since we left the bunker, and decided to take a short term vacation. I throw my blankets off of myself, and stand up. I get dressed, in my usual black clothes, leather jacket, and high heeled black boots. I comb my black and blue hair, then pull it back into a pony tail. I walk across my room, pull open my door, stroll into the hallway, and knock on the door across from mine. Moments later a dirty-blond haired, green eyed, man opens the door and smiles. "Wanna walk?" I ask. "Sure." He replies, then tells Sam he'll be back, and follows me through the hall, down the elevator, through the lobby, and outside. "What are we talking about?" He asks. "Life." I answer. "Oh, my favorite." He says, sarcastically. We are currently in Florida, its hot, we are staying in a nice hotel, there are bees, flowers, and trees everywhere. There is a small garden behind the hotel, its a tall labyrinth made of hedges, a marble bench in the middle, and hundreds of beautifully colored and scented flowers. We walk the labyrinth and find ourselves in the middle, and sitting on the marble bench. I stare at a huge yellow flower, the color triggers a word in my mind,  _Hufflepuff._ Then i begin to chuckle. "What?" Ask Dean. "Nothing. It's just, my geek brain seems to be returning a bit." I reply. "Good." Says Dean. "Why's that?" I ask. "I like you that way, you're happier in your world of sci-fi and fantasy." He says. I look up at him. "Well, i think you would like it here too. Why don't you-." I begin. "No." He says. "But if you just read-." I try. "Uh-uhn. Nope, I'm gonna leave the geek-ism to you and Sam." Says Dean, smiling at me. "I don't do the whole Harry Potter, jigglypuff thing." I narrow my eyes at him. "No. Get out of the maze. Leave me, you disgrace." I joke, trying to push him off the bench. "What?" He asks. "Jigglypuff is a pokemon!" I exclaim, shoving him off the bench. He grabs my arm at the last second, and I fall with him, right on top of him. "You brought this on yourself." I say, staring down at him. "I know." He replies. Then I let out an uncharacteristic giggle. Dean laughs. "Stop." I mutter, blushing. "No. Its adorable. You never giggle." He says, smiling at me. "Of course I don't, I sound so ditzy when i do." I say. "No you don't. Its a nice change." He replies. I smile down at him. "Yeah, well, don't expect to hear it again." I say, getting off of him. He sits up, and looks at me. I am leaning against the marble bench, and he is sitting to my right, looking at me, with a small grin on his face. I suddenly imagine him as a teenager again. I imagine we are on some hunting trip, nothing is wrong in our lives. I never lost myself, Sam hadn't been possessed by an angel, the angels never fell, and Dean was never a demon. We were just sitting alone, in a garden, hiding from Sam and Johns fighting. I might have cracked a joke or two about some geeky thing that Dean would never understand, then he'd make fun of me. I would do my awkward smile in hopes of Dean noticing me, maybe pick a flower and pull off its petals, or laugh, and refuse to tell him what was so funny. Teenage things that we never did, because we grew up warped. I look over at Dean, he is his right age now, and I smile at him. I see him pull a small green flower with a million tiny petals on it, off a bush, then he hands it to me. I smirk. "You sap." I mumble, taking the flower, and spinning it between my fingers. He doesn't retaliate. "I remembered you told me once that your favorite color was green." He says. "That was years, and years ago." I say. "Well, it goes to show that I listen." He remarks. "Sometimes." I reply, smiling. Dean doesn't respond again. I notice he just stares at me with a dazed look on his face. "What's wrong?" I ask, slipping the flower behind my ear. "Nothing. Its nothing." He replies. I sigh. "You cant lie to me, Dean." I say, turning so my whole body faces him. He chuckles, and looks at me with his green eyes, a crooked smile on his face. "I'm sorry." He says. I am surprised, and I know my eyes have widened a lot. "What for?" I ask, quickly. "I abandoned you, hurt you, tried to kill you. Take your pick." He says. I sigh. "Listen Dean, yes you abandoned me, yes I'm mad at you, and no I might not forgive you, but you thought you were doing the right thing. And that doesn't mean you were correct to abandon me, but, you were just trying to save me." I say. "And, _you_ didn't try to kill me, the disease did. That was _not_ you, no matter how much you tell yourself it was. Because, It wasn't. So stop beating yourself up over crap you couldn't control." Dean doesn't seem to absorb the words, but he nods. "And maybe... I can begin the road to forgiving you..." I say, quietly. He seems a bit happier at this. Dean moves closer, and leans against the bench, right next to me, shoulder to shoulder. I turn my head, and stare at him. "I'm sorry I was so hard on you." I say. "Its fine. You were just telling me what happened, and you're completely right." He replies. "Well, nothings new there." I answer, smirking. "Shut up." He says, smiling. "Make me." I reply. He raises his eyebrows at me. Then he kisses me. Its been years, and years, and he still kisses me like nothing has changed. Like nothing terrible has happened. Like we are still young. Before everything went wrong. Before we lost each other. Before we drifted apart. Before we hurt each other. Before we grew up. Deans kiss is one of the few things that take me down a spiral of emotions. It intoxicates me. Like drugs or alcohol. It is something that I can't let go of. Something that will always makes me happy. When the kiss breaks I stare at Dean. "Why do you still kiss me, after everything I've done?" Dean asks. "Because I love you." I answer, softly. "You shouldn't, I'm poison." He says. "That's why I like you, I'm the antidote." I reply, reaching for his hand. He grins a bit. But he doesn't say what both of us are thinking... This will never last forever.


	6. Chapter 6

I am sitting in a dark hotel room, whiskey in hand, laptop across from me, on the table. I have been holed up here for a long time now...a very long time. I've been hunting every chance I get, to get my mind off of the pain. But there haven't been any jobs recently so I've been in this old hotel for two weeks now. I've been alone, crying off and on, getting myself drunk enough to fall asleep, calling Sam everyday with no success. Its been four months and I've finally have brought myself to accept the truth...Dean is dead. The hellhounds got him, and there is nothing I can do about it. He is dead, buried six feet under in the middle of some woods. Its been hell.   
I barely sleep anymore, its just constant waking up with a start, gasping, eyes wildly scanning the room. Its like awaking from the worst nightmare you can have. But there is no dream to wake from. Its just reality calling for me, to cause more pain. When I am awake it never changes. I live in pain. I am the definition of pain. But, I stop myself before I can feel pity, and I remember who is to blame for this. The monsters. The monsters are always to blame. The vampires, demons, ghosts. So, the least I can do is kill them. Not that it destroys the pain, or fills the hole. It doesn't help. It just fuels the fire. And, goddammit, I've done everything I can to get Dean back, I've tried to sell my soul more times than I can count, I've tried witchcraft, I've read so much lore, my eyes can't read another book. Demons started ignoring my calls, I have hurt so many witches I'm not allowed to contact the grand coven anymore, and every ritual from lore I've read requires the grace of an angel, and a tear of the devil, and I am positive none of those things exist. I am so broken not even God himself could fix me. Though none of this compared to the next week when I got a call on my cell phone.

"Hello?" I answered one night, while pouring over research about Wendigo's. "Alex? Thank God." Replies the voice. "Yeah, who is this?" I ask. "Dean." Replies the voice. "Excuse me?" I say, a fire suddenly rising in my middle. "Alex, its me!" Yells the voice. "Its Dean, dammit!" I realize I'm not breathing, until I feel faint. "I asked you who this was." I reply, angrily. "Its Dean Winchester!" Yells the voice. "Call me again, and I will find and kill you." I say abruptly, before hanging up. I am staring blankly at the hotel wall. My hands shaking, the fire in my middle being fanned, jaw clenched. My hand grasps my glass full of whiskey, and I fling it against the wall, it shattering into a million pieces on impact. I stand up, arms flinging across the table throwing my research and laptop to the ground. That was just the beginning. After that, it was the lamps, TV, radio, windows, and every knob was ripped off every drawer. I grabbed my duffle that was covered in glass, cutting my hands. I grab the keys off my bed, and leave the hotel, in a fit of rage. A man, the manager I think, grabs my arm, yelling. I rip my hand from his grip. "HEY!" He roars. I turn, and stare at this man, my hooded jacket covering my eyes. This man is three times my size. "ARE YOU GOING TO PAY FOR THIS?!" He yells. "Put it on my tab pal." I reply, before getting in my truck and tearing out of the parking lot so fast there was zero change she could have gotten my license plate number. After twenty minutes of driving seventy above the speed limit I pull into a small ditch off the side of the road. I stare out the window. And I feel a tear fall from my eye down my face. "Dammit, Dean." I whisper, voice wavering. "Why did you have to go and leave me alone?"

Now its May, I am sitting, alone, still, in my hotel room, doing significantly better. I have gotten myself together. I have a lot less bottles of whiskey, and I am only hunting when I need to now. When I'm not hunting, I'm working a side job. I am a bartender. Its not complicated, in fact all I have to do is hand middle aged men, and boys who just turned 21, beer, who enjoy to gawk at me, until I call them out. I have surprised myself at how much I've changed. I have an actual job, a friend, and I can still do what makes me, me. Hunt.

"Daisy!" I call. A woman with large brown eyes, and curly blonde hair peers around the corner, she smiles at me, the gap in her front teeth makes her look especially likable. "Yeah, Allie?" She asks. "Would it kill you to talk to Marv?" I ask, motioning to the brown haired, blue eyed man, who always eyes Daisy. "No... But it would probably give him a heart attack." She replies. "Daisy." I sigh. "Fine, I'll go talk to Marv, if you deal with those agent guys on the other side of the pub, they ordered a burger and a salad." She says. "The food is on the counter." I smile, and give he hand a pat. "Got it, good luck with Marv." I reply, winking. "Thanks. Table 8." She says, smiling. I pick up two plates, one holding a burger, and the other holding a salad. I hum along with the Beatles song that is playing, and walk through the Pub, swaying my hips, and mildly missing running into people. I just about reach table 8, i can only see the back of one brown haired figure, then i look down to make sure I have my note pad, incase they need something else. I set down the food, and grab my note pad, and look up. "Is that all i can get for-." I suddenly stop, and i stare at the agent. "Sam." I gasp, taking a step back, running into someone. "Alex." He replies, the brown haired, hazel eyes man staring at me, a sheepish smile on his lips. I have a fight of flight reaction, and this time i fly, oh i fly. I rip off my apron, and run past people, knocking some over, i just run for the door. The freezing cold air hits my face and i feel my head ache. I begin to shiver in my short-shorts, and tank top. "God. Oh God." I mutter, clutching my head. I hear the door burst open behind me, and i fling around. I stare at Sam a moment before i punch him, as hard as i can. "I CALLED YOU, EVERYDAY, FOR MONTHS, YOU BASTARD!" I yell. When he turns to face me, his jaw is bleeding. "I know! I know, Alex! I didn't answer calls from anyone!" He yells back. "Don't you yell at me, Sam Winchester!" I roar. "I'm sorry, Alex." He says, softly. "I was in a bad place." He says. "A bad-." I scoff. "A BAD PLACE?!" I fling my hands in the air. "I WAS IN A BAD PLACE TOO, SAM! I WAS IN A TERRIBLE PLACE! I DAMN NEAR DIED OF ALCOHOL POISONING!" I screamed. "THE LEAST YOU COULD HAVE DONE WAS ANSWERED MY CALL, DAMMIT!" Sam looks at me, like a wounded puppy. "Do not give me that puppy look, Sam!" I hiss. I set off through the parking lot. "Lets go! You are coming with me!" I say. "Alex-." He begins. "Sam. You owe me." I reply. He glances at the pub, then follows me. I get in my truck, and he follows, getting into the passengers side. I yell at him the whole way back to the hotel I have been staying at. Once we get inside my room, I fling myself onto my bed, staring at him, eyebrows raised. "Well?" I ask. He just looks at me. "No excuse? No nothing?" I ask. "You are completely right." He says. I sigh.  "That's not what i want to hear." I reply, frowning. "I just want to really know why.  We were both in bad places, i get that, but you are smart Sam. You know we would have helped each other, we would have not been so broken." I say. "I-I can't tell you." He says. "Can't or wont?" I ask, scoffing. He stares a moment, and mumbles "Won't." I shake my head. "Right. This is how to treat a sister, Sam." I reply. "Alex..." I hold up my hand. "You told me I was family, your sister! This isn't how you treat a sister Sam. So i guess I'm not family." I reply, eyes shifting to the floor. No one says anything. "I was just getting my life back together." I sigh, feeling sick. Suddenly the hotel door bangs open.

"Dean." I gasp. I see him. Exactly how I remembered him. His blonde hair, emerald green eyes. "Hiya, Country Bumpkin." He says. I run to him, fling my arms around his neck, and squeeze him. I feel like I've just returned home after a long home sick trip. A tear rolls down my cheek, and then another, and then a stream turns into a river. I am so relieved he is standing in front of me, I can barely stand it. Neither of us realize Sam has left until three minutes later. "How are you alive?" I ask him. "Well, and angel 'raised me from perdition'." He replies. "An Angel?" I ask. "Yeah, he says they have work for me." He says. "Wow." I mutter, finally letting go of him, gently. He looks at me, just stares. "Stop looking at me." I reply, suddenly my voice sounds stern. "I've been in hell, can't I at least look at you?" He asks, giving me a small smile. "Fine. But not too long, or I'll have to charge ya." I answer, my voice regaining a playful tone that it hasn't used for a while. "There's my Alex." He replies. 

 


	7. Chapter 7

"You became a criminal?!" Asks Dean, his eyes wide, as he shifted them from me to the laptop on the table. "Not me, Lizzie Brimback." I reply. "How are you even here?!" exclaims Dean. "I'm good. Besides, it was just destruction of property, and man-slaughter, but they were vampires." I answer, smiling. Dean scoffs softly. "You are ridiculous." He says. "Ridiculously cute, maybe." I say, before I stand up, and grab my blue sweatshirt. "Where are you going?" Asks Sam, walking through the door. "I was going to go get food. Anyone hungry?" I say. "Starving." The brothers reply together. "All right then. I'll make a stop at the pub." I answer. "Is that a good idea? I mean, we had a bit of a brawl there." Says Sam. "I'm sure it'll be fine, Daisy will understand." I answer. "Oh, the hot blonde?" Asks Dean, before his face changes and he seems to realize he's made a mistake. I just laugh. "Yes, the hot blonde." I reply, winking, and grabbing my car keys and TARDIS wallet. I walk out the door and get into my truck. I pull out of the parking lot, drive to the pub, a Zeppelin tape blaring through the speakers as I sing along in my "Classic Rock Worthy" voice, as Dean calls it. When I reach the pub i head inside and sit at the counter. I see Daisy turn the corner, once she notices me she rushes over. "Oh my God! You're okay!" She says. "Yeah. Why wouldn't i be, Daisy?" I ask. "I saw that big agent guy follow you, Allie! I thought he kidnapped ya', or something!" She exclaims. "Daisy, if you were that worried why didn't you come look for me?" I wonder. "I couldn't! Lenny said if i left now i would be fired." Replies Daisy. "Like you.... Lenny said for me to tell you to pick up your last paycheck next week. Your 'antics' are bad for business." I smile a bit. "Oh thank God i didn't have to quit." I say, relieved. "You were gonna quit?" Asks Daisy, looking surprised. "Yeah, family matters came up." I reply. " People don't usually give up their jobs for family..." Replies Daisy, slowly. "Well... its more like my brother, and a very good friend have returned." I say. "I'd have to say a very, very, good friend." Says Daisy, smirking. "Yeah. In fact it was the blonde agent at table 8 earlier." I answer, smiling. "Oh, agent Page? I got his numb-. Oh..." Daisy stopped talking and blushed a bit. "Its fine. He's not staying. He never stays anywhere." I reply. "Right... Can i get you something?" She asks, awkwardly. "Yeah, actually, two bacon cheese burgers, and a chefs salad." I reply. "And two shots." Daisy smiles now, and picks up two shot glasses, then fills them with alcohol, and hands one to me. I throw it back, and Daisy sips hers. "You are a monster."She comments, before setting it down and going to give the chef my order. 'Why, because i can hold my whiskey?" I ask, grinning. Daisy makes a face at me, then disappears around the corner. I chuckle and slowly spin my shot glass. "Hey there, Allie." Comes a familiar voice. I turn around, and face the collage boy that comes in every other night, Jacob Scott, dark hair, and dark eyes, well built. "Jake." I reply, briskly. He takes a seat on the bar stool next to me. "So, how you doing?" He asks. "Fine. You?" I ask. I am always very short with Jake. I see him smirk at me. "That kind of attitude, wont get you many guys." He comments. "How do you know I'm not into chicks?" I ask, rolling my eyes. "Your not skinny enough to be into chicks." He replies. My eyebrows raise at him. I can smell the liquor on him, its strong. "Call a cab and go home, Jacob, you're drunk." I reply. "Only if you come with me." He says, his words really slurring now. "Come on, whens the last time you've actually gotten an offer? I mean, you're not exactly miss america." He goes on. I clench my fists, and turn away. "Come on, Allie, lets-." I cut him off. "GO AWAY,  JAKE." I hiss. Suddenly he grabs my wrist, forcefully. Before I can react there is the sound of glass shattering and Jake falls to the ground. I look up and see Daisy standing behind the spot Jake was in, holding half a shattered wine bottle. "Did you just-?" I begin. Daisy looks very meek, and a bit scared. "He's a nasty drunk, full on abusive." Replies Daisy, shaken up a bit. "Wow." I comment. "He's a drunk and a cheat, and his girlfriend doesn't even know. It's a shame, I like Tammy." She says, handing me a plastic bag, holding my food. "Thanks." I say, giving her a smile. "Sure, now get out before Lenny has you arrested." Says Daisy. "What about you?" I ask. "I'll be fine, I was acting out of self defense. Besides, first time offender." She adds. "I owe you, Daise." I say, then i hand her two twenty dollar bills. "Yeah you do." She replies, before waving me out the door.

 

When i arrive at the hotel am humming "Stairway to Heaven", as I grab the bag containing food, my wallet and, keys. I jump down from my truck and make my way inside. "Yes, there are two paths you can go by. But in the long run. There's still time to change the road you're on. And it makes me wonder." I sing quietly, as i unlock the door and set down the bag of food on the table. Its dark, and my singing slowly fades into humming, and then disappears. I flick on the light and see a person sitting on the bed across the room. "Dean, where's Sam?" I ask. There isn't a response. "Dean?" I ask again. I slowly reach for the gun that sits on my bed, as i walk closer to the figure. Suddenly the  figure stands and turns in one swift motion, and all the lights turn on. I gasp, then cock the gun, and shoot at the person. The bullets go through him, but he doesn't stop. "What are you?" I ask, stepping back a bit. "I am Castiel. An angel of the lord." He replies, then he walks up to me, and places his hand on my forehead. I feel a searing pain course through my face, then i hear it, the voice. "Do not be afraid. I am not a wrathful creature." Its soft, and flowing, calming. Then i hear yelling. "CASS NO!" And the hand is removed from my head. Once my eyes come back into focus i see Dean and Castiel in a heap on the floor. "Dean!" I exclaim. I rush forward, and grab Castiel's hand, and help him up. "Why did you-?" I begin. "I though he was hurting you... Or killing you." Says Dean, as he stands up. "No. He was just talking." I say. I see Castiel's eyebrows raise. "You could understand me?" He asks. "Yes. Y-you were talking." I reply, a bit confused. "Interesting... You are strong. She heard my true voice. Not the voice of my vessel." Says Castiel. "Your true voice?" I ask. "Yes. This is just the voice of my vessel, the voice you heard was an angels voice. Not even Dean could handle that." Castiel finishes. I look to Dean who's eyebrows are furrowed. "Dont do it again. You could have hurt her, or made her go deaf." Says Dean, then he takes my hand, and guides me away from Castiel. "I like him." I say, finally. "Yeah, well don't. He's a dick." Says Dean. "Well so are you, and I still like you. Besides, there's something about him. I like it." I insist. Dean sighs. "What ever." He replies. "Theres no point arguing with you..." I smile. "Because I'll win?" I ask. "No. Because your stubborn." He replies. "All i can hear is Winner." I say, winking. "Mmhmm." He mutters. Then we sit at the table and open our food. A moment later Castiel joins us, sitting by me. "Who are you?" He asks, ten minutes, and a burger later. I swallow my last bite of food, and look at him. "I'm Alex. Sam and Deans friend." I say. "This is Alex? I though Alex was a males name. I am thoroughly confused." Says Cass, looking from me to Dean. "Its short for Alexandra." I reply, smiling. Castiel nods slowly. "How do you know the Winchesters?" Asks Castiel. "No offense Cass, but this isn't exactly a share circle, Sam has got a job for us." Says Dean, quite rudely. I stand up, grab Deans wrist, and haul him towards the door. "I am so sorry, Cass." I say, as I slam the door behind Dean and Myself. "Knock it off!" I hiss at Dean. "Alex-." Begins Dean. "No, stop. Dean, that was hella rude. He's just making conversation, for heavens sake." I say, shaking my head. "Alex, he doesn't want conversation, he wants so learn about you an use you." Says Dean. I scoff. "I-I can't believe I'm hearing this. He's a damn angel, Dean." I insist. "Oh, trouble in paradise?" Comes Sam's voice. We both face him "Shut up!" Sam looks amused. "Dean said you had a job." I say to Sam. "Yeah. Lets get inside." Says Sam. We follow him inside, he greets Cass and sits down. "Theres been a local death." Says Sam, taking a bite of his salad. "Who?" I ask, offering Cass a French fry, smiling. "Oh, Angels don't really-." He begins, then takes a fry. "Thanks." He replies, giving a small smile. "The victim was a man named... Jacob Scott." Says Sam, looking a his laptop. "J-Jacob?!" I exclaim. "Yeah... Did you know him?" Asks Dean. "Well, yeah, he was a regular at the pub, a real drunk." I reply, turning Sam's laptop towards myself. "It turns out he was found dead in his car in a ditch." Says Sam. I cover my mouth with my hands. "Oh my God... Poor Tammy." I whisper. "Who?" Asks Sam. "Tammy. His girlfriend. Oh my gosh... she doesn't know." I say. "How do you know?" Asks Dean. "Jake never comes home till late, she won't know." I explain. "He is always out, getting drunk, cheating on her. He tried it with me." Dean shifts in his chair. "Did it ...work?" He asks. "No, Dean! I'm not a slut." I reply. Dean raised his hands in the air as a symbol of truce. "Where did he crash?" I ask. "Down on millers road, you won't miss it, the police were just getting there when i left, so, you'll see the cop cars." Replies Sam. "Alright, I'll go check it out." I say. "I'll come with you." Says Dean. "I'll be fine, alone, Dean." I reply, standing up and grabbing my keys. "I can go, I was going to head back anyway." Says Sam. I roll my eyes. "I survived fine without you two for four months, and I can do it again for an hour." I answer, and walk out the door. 

 

I arrive at Baker street, immediately seeing the cars like Sam said. I grab a false badge and pull on my blazer, and make my way to the crime scene. I see a round, man with a large bushy mustache standing in front of police tape. "Agent Sarah Jane Smith." I say, holding out the badge. "Hey, Like in Doctor Who." Points out the man, his grim look becoming a smile. "Its good to see a classic fan." I remark, returning his smile, as i duck under the tape. "Its good to see such a young classic fan." Replies the man. "Ditto." I respond, then give him a friendly wave and walk to a police officer. "Officer." I say. The officer turns around. "Allie?" Asks the officer. My eyes widen as I stare at the local policeman. I completely forgot I had been living here. "Mr Rockwell!" I exclaim. "Its good to see you." He seems confused. "You too, but Allie, why are you here?" He asks. I suddenly have an idea. I glance around quickly. Then lean in. "My real name is Sarah Jane Smith, i work for the FBI, I am currently undercover. Suspicious activity and all that." I say. "Uh-huh.." He mutters. "I can't tell you more, or I'd have to kill you." I say, giving a chuckle. "Right, Uh, can I call your supervisor Miss Smith?" He asks. I pull out a small black card and hand it to him. "Go ahead, just don't take too long I have a meeting in half and hour." I joke, smiling. "You have a meeting at four thirty in the morning?" He asks, dialing the number on the card that's listed as 'supervisor'. "Uh... Its more of a Trainee meeting, I have to...train them... its a test to see if they are committed enough to get up... at four..." I realized he's stopped listening, he is listening to the ringing of the phone. "Hello, Agent Beaver?" Asks Officer Rockwell. "Yeah, I've got a Sarah Jane Smith down here that says she is authorized to take a look at this accident." I can hear Bobby's rough voice on the other end. "And she claims she is undercover. The state should be alerted first, don't you think?" Rockwell winces. "Yes, I understand the meaning of undercover, Sir. I am sorry. Alright, you have a good-. Oh...he hung up." Rockwell looks up at me. "Well, you have free roam Agent Smith." Says Officer Rockwell. "Thank you." I reply, and walk to the wreckage. "Oh my God." I mutter, staring at the mess of blood. Half of Jacob was through the Windshield. "Excuse me, what do you think happened?" I ask a near by officer. A tall young man walks up to me. "We think he got ran off the road." Says the officer, who turned out to be a deputy. "He'd have to hit more than a tree to be completely ripped out of his seat belt like that." I comment. "He wasn't wearing a seat belt." Replies the deputy. "Still... he wouldn't go through the windshield unless he was doing at least a hundred into a building." I insist. "Well, what do you think happened?" Asks the deputy, clearly interested. "I think that something big and powerful is really angry. Thank you for your time, Deputy." 

 

"Vengeful ghost." Says Sam. "No...I talked to Tammy, he was a cheat and a drunk, but he wasn't a murderer. And he was pretty clean, well as far as the law goes." I say. "Vamp?" Asks Dean. "No. They kill or turn their victim..." I reply, leafing through a book. "Maybe it was just a crash." Says Sam, slamming his book closed. "It can't have been! He couldn't be rammed through a windshield like that! Its impossible!" I exclaim, standing up, my chair toppling over. Sam and Dean stare at me. "I-I'm sorry...I had just gotten used to working completely alone... It's hard..." I say, then i clear my throat. "Why don't I go get some breakfast." I suggest, looking at the clock. We had been up for hours. "I'll come with you." Says Dean. I begin to say something, but don't. "Alright." I reply. Dean grabs his jacket and keys, then we head to the parking lot. We get in the car, but Dean doesn't start it. "You know I'm sorry, right?" He asks, avoiding my eyes. I sigh. "Dean, you couldn't help it. You died... you were in hell." I answer. "I know, but i can't help feeling guilty. You had no one." He says. "You were in hell for four months Dean, I'm pretty sure you were more traumatized." I reply. He doesn't respond. I reach for his hand. "Look at me, ok?" I ask. After a minute he looks. "It wasn't your fault. I'm not mad at you. I love you." I say, giving a smile. "I know." He answers. "Does that scare you?" I ask, joking. "Nah. Like i said, I know." Replies Dean. "Shut up." I laugh, hitting his chest. He turns on the engine and we pull out of the parking lot. Most girls would be scared telling a man they love him, but I know that nothing I could say would scare Dean, and I know he loves me back, but he doesn't say it. I doubt he ever will, but thats just him, he doesn't voice his emotions. That's why i am so important to him, i think. I can figure him out easily and I know when he needs help, or is just feeling horrible, and I can cheer him up. I stare at him again, staring at the road, his green eyes fixed ahead. Suddenly I see his eye twitch, and his mouth wince, and I think something that never crossed my mind. "Dean... Do you remember hell?" I ask. He doesn't answer right away. "No. Not really. I just remember dying and waking up in a pine box." He replies, not taking his eyes form the road. "Please don't lie to me, Dean." I ask. "Just tell me." He sighs. "I remember. I remember it all... Just don't tell Sam, okay?" He says. "Alright." I reply. I know if i push him farther nothing good will happen. The rest of the trip is us rocking out to some Zeppelin, Guns and Roses, and Grateful Dead (Per my request, and a little begging). When we pull up to a diner I take Deans hand. He seems a bit confused at first, because he stops walking towards the entrance and looks at me, but I give him a smile and he keeps walking. I want him to know I don't blame him, and that I still love him, even though I lost him. This is the only way to do it without words. We find a seat in the diner and sit down. I pick up the menu and begin to read. "Pie. Lets just get pie." I say, suddenly. Dean puts his menu down, and chuckles at me. "Good to see abandonment hasn't changed your taste in food." He says. "Nope. I haven't touched any veggies... well except kale chips. I need to admit, Daisy makes a mean Kale Chip." I say laughing. "Does she?" He asks. "Mmhmm. She gave me the recipe, but i dont have a stove." I laugh. "She's a nice girl, like a sister to me. I could get you her number if you want." I'm not going to lie, I couldn't care less if Dean went out with Daisy or any other chick. I told him I love him, I don't know how, and I don't care, I just do, and thats good enough for me. So if he wants to sleep with a random whore, fine by me, just don't brag about it. "Nah. I wouldn't stick around long enough to follow through on anything." Says Dean. "Probably for the best... Daisy is a long term kinda gal. Her last boyfriend had been with her since high school, sadly he died. OD'd." I say. "That sucks." He says. Suddenly a waitress comes to our table. She's very tall, and i wearing quite a smile. "What can I get you?" She asks, in a cheerful voice. "Two slices of apple pie, coffee, and the name of your hair dresser." I say, ending with a laugh. I admire her bright blue hair, cut into a bob. "Oh, why thank you, I just get it done down the road at 'floral cuts" they specialize in hair dye." She says. "I work there on the weekends." I can't tear my eyes form the color. "Thats really cool." I reply, grinning. "Thank you. I'll be out with your pie and coffee any minute." Says The waitress, then she rushed away. "You like that kind of thing? I thought you didn't care about hair and stuff." Says Dean. "I dont that much, I just really like color. It reminds me of this one Harry Potter Character, Tonks. She loved that kind of hair." I reply. "You are such a geek." He laughs. "Oh, I know." I smile. The waitress comes back with out food, and the number of the hair salon. "Thank you so much!" I exclaim, tucking it in my pocket. We dig into our pie. "Oh my god. This is so much better than the pie at the pub, their is frozen and thrown in the microwave." I say. Dean begins to laugh, hard. "What?" I ask. "Theres pie, on your nose." He laughs. "What can I say? Pie is pie." I answer, wiping it off. Dean just laughs more. "I don't think I've laughed this hard in a while." He says. "Well, I'm glad I could make you happy with my pie face." I reply, smiling. 

 

That happy breakfast didn't last long, 10:30 that night, I get a call on my cell phone. "Agent Smith?" Asks the Sheriff, over the phone. "Sheriff. Can I help you?" I ask, holding my finger up to shush Sam and Dean. "I hope so. Its odd, real odd. Could you meet me down at riverman street?" He says. " Absolutely. Thank you Sheriff." I answer, then hang up. "What was that?" Asks Dean. "49 Riverman Street. The Sheriff has paged, something is wrong." I say, grabbing my jacket and keys. "I'll go and check it out, and text you the details, stay and keep researching." I say. "Aye Aye captain." Says Sam, grinning. "Be good." I say. Then I rush out the door, and get into my car. I begin down the road, but i nearly run off it into a ditch when I am startled by Castiel next to me. I swerve and miss another car. "CASS!" I scream. "I'm sorry. I needed to talk to you." Says Castiel. "Whats wrong?" I ask regaining my wheel. "You are very special. Strong." He says. "Well, thank you, but why are you telling me this?" I ask. "You are special, but I haven't figured out why. You must be careful, you might be important later." He says. "Oh...okay..." I say, confused. "Hey, Cass-." I turn my head, he is gone. "Son of a..." My sentence trails off. Once I reach the address, I realize Its not a house address like I thought I was, its a lake. I get out of the truck, with my badge in hand, flash it to the officer standing in front of the yellow tap, he lets me in. "Officer Rockwell." I address him. "Thanks for coming, agent Smith." He replies, shaking my hand. "Sure thing, whats the trouble?" I ask. "See for yourself." He says, gesturing to a blue car. I raise my eyebrows and walk to the car. I peer inside, excepting a mess of blood and human, but there is nothing. I straighten back up and stare at Officer Rockwell. "There is nothing there..." I reply. "I know. That's the problem." He says. "May I ask why?" I suggest. "Hell yes. We have security footage of something incredibly odd happening. If you'll come back to the station with me." He says. "Yeah, sure." I reply.

I arrive at the police station 10 minutes later, and follow Officer Rockwell into the station. "Heres the footage you requested, sir." Says the deputy I saw the other night, he greets us with a laptop. I smile at him, he puts the laptop on the table, smiles back, then leaves. "Alright, heres the footage, watch." He says. He presses the spacebar, and the black and white footage begins to play. The car rolls into view, at least 11 feet away is a woman, wearing a white dress, the car stops and lets the woman in, he pulls away. The footage changes to another camera, a mile down the road, suddenly the car stops, it shakes and then nothing happens after that. I look up at the officer. "W-what was that?" I ask. "We have no clue. That car sat there for three days, not moving, then our deputy brought it to our attention. No one got in or out of that car. It was completely empty when we got there." Says Sheriff Rockwell. Suddenly there was a warble on his walkie talkie. "Would you excuse me?" He asks. "Sure." I reply. He leaves the room, and heads to an office. I watch the footage again. Then i turn around, the deputy was sitting behind a desk, doing paper work. "Excuse me." I say, walking up to him.  "Yeah?" He asks. "Could you make me a copy of the security footage? The whole three days, maybe?" i say. "Uh... I don't think Officer Rockwell would like that." He responds. "Please? I've got work to do." I say. "I really shouldn't." He says. I can see he isn't going to budge, I have one last shot. I internally groan, and shoot myself. Then i take a deep breath. "You know, it would really help me a lot if you could get me a copy." I say. Leaning over onto his desk. "If i don't get this in by tonight, i could be fired. Could you help me out?" I ask, giving a smile. "Maybe we could work something out." Says the deputy.

 

I return to the hotel half an hour later, and hand Sam a DVD. "Whats this?" He asks. "Three days worth of security footage." i reply. "How did you get this?" Asks Dean, putting the DVD into his laptop. "I don't want to talk about it." I grumble, then i sit down and press play. Dean looks over me. Car, Woman, Mile down the road, car stops, car shakes, then nothing. We stare at the video. "I can put it on fast forw-." Begins Dean. "Hold it. Go back!" I say, leaning in, and looking at the video. " Sam hits the back button. "Go back another two frames." I say. "There!" I point to a very fuzzy image of the woman in a white dress. "Now press play." I say. When Sam hits the button, and the woman disappears. "Dammit." I mutter. I grab my phone. I dial. "Hello sheriff?" I ask, once the other end clicks. "Yes. Who's this?" He asks. "Agent Smith. Listen, I'm going to need the records on the victim." I say. "Sure. I'll send them right over." He replies. "Thanks." Then I hang up. "We are going to need to get some information on this guy, his contacts, why a ghost would want him dead." I say. "You're going to read through his files?" Asks Sam. "Well, just until i get some contacts, then I'm going to talk to them." I say. Suddenly there is a whooshing sound. Everyone turns around. "Castiel." I say. The angel is standing before us. "Alex, I need to talk to you." Says Castiel, looking at me. "Can it wait, Cass? We are in the-." I begin. Suddenly Castiel places his hand on my forehead. My eyes fly closed. Then I take a deep breath and open them again. I look around, we aren't in the hotel room. "Where are we?" I ask, looking around. "Tokyo." Says Castiel. "What the hell are we doing in Tokyo?" I ask, looking around. We are sitting in a red restaurant, we are at a table, and there is a waitress standing by us, forcing a smile.  She says something in Japanese. Castiel responds, then she rushes away. "Why are we here, Cass?" I ask. "I needed to talk to you." He replies. "You couldn't have done it at the hotel?" I ask. "No, I couldn't have. You didn't seem like you would cooperate, besides, Sam and Dean can't know." Says Castiel. "Know what?" I ask. "That your a Nephilim." Says Castiel.  My mouth drops open. "You mean...Like half human, half angel?" I ask. "Yes. Your mother, Dina, was an angel. The angel of learning. She fell from heaven, because she had fallen in love with a human." Says Castiel. My hands cover my mouth. "T-Then how did she get killed?" I ask. "She lost her grace not long after you were born, she was mortal when she died. Heaven had taken it, because she had created you. An abomination." Says Castiel. "You have to kill me, now, right?" I ask. "It would be the right thing to do..." Says Castiel. "For who? Me, or You?" I ask. "But, I'm not going to." He says. "I am just going to extract the little grace that you have, and erase your mind, It isn't permanent ." He says. He begins to reach forward. "Wait!" I exclaim. "Alex, I have to." Says Cass. "I know... But... what was my mom like... in heaven?" I ask. "Uh... She was kind, very wise, honestly, she corrected me quite a bit." Says Castiel. "Well, don't get to used to that not happening." I say. "Don't worry, I wont. I look forward to getting to know you Alex." He says, smiling. Then he reaches for my head.

"Whoa." I say, looking around at Sam and Dean. "What the hell, Cass!?" Asks Dean, angrily. "I'm sorry, It was an accident." Says Castiel. "He took me to Tokyo." I laugh. "I've always wanted to go to Tokyo." I smile at Castiel. "I told you he was a good one." Castiel looks at me, his eyes look a bit sad, I don't know why, there's isn't any reason. "W-We were on top of the Tokyo Tower. I saw tons of people below... It was probably the coolest thing I've seen in a while." I say, staring at Cass. "I didn't mean to take you to Tokyo, I just wanted to test if you could still hear my true voice." Says Castiel. Then suddenly there was a high pitched ringing. I scream and fall to the ground, clutching my ears. Suddenly the ringing stops. "I am so sorry." Says Castiel, grabbing my hand and helping me up. "CASS!" Yells Dean, his deep voice making me jump a foot and back up. "I told you not to do it again! What the hell?!" He says. "I'm sorry, I needed to see if it still worked." Says Castiel. "Well it doesn't." Replies Dean. "I'm sorry.' Says Castiel again. I turn around and he's gone. I shake my head. "Dean..." I mutter. Dean stares at me, his eyes look hurt, but he is scowling. Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I open it, expecting the Sheriff, but its the Deputy. "Hey. I brought the files." He says, smirking. "But, if you wanted I could stay." He adds. Suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder, and the door opens a bit. I see the Deputy's eyes widen a bit, and I know, both Sam and Dean are standing behind me. They are both significantly taller than the young deputy. He hands me the files and tips his hat a bit. "H-Have a good day." He says, before retreating. I back up, and Sam closes the door. "Thanks." I say, then i spread out the files on a table. "What was that about?" Dean asks. "Well, how do you think I got the reports? He certainly didn't give them to me out of the kindness of his heart." I reply, facing them. "So you, what?" Continues Dean, as Sam sort of chuckles. "I-I'm not following." Says Dean. I chuckle. "I gave him my bra Dean." I blurt out, before bursting into a fit of laughter. "Oh...." Mutters Dean. "Could I get one?" He asks. "Shut up." I reply, smiling. I turn back to the files. "Victim is Christopher Lopez. Contacts are listed as Jennifer Carrie, Lupe Lopez, and Andre Lopez. Look up Jennifer, she's listed as significant other." I say. I turn back around and Sam is already on his laptop. "Found it. She is 29, and works at some hair salon. Address; 221 East Wickerman Drive." Says Sam. "Alright. I'll get right on that." I say, gabbing my coat. "I'll come with you." Says Sam, getting up. "No. I'm fine alone." I reply, shaking my head, and avoiding his eyes. "Alex, I can help." He says, grabbing the Impala keys. "No. I don't want you to." I say, softly. "Why?" Asks Sam. I finally look at his crushed face, and I feel sick, because I am staring at the fourteen year old boy who would walk out of his fathers hotel room, into mine, and sleep with me, seeking comfort. I am reminded of the faint sniffle that would escape his 'sleeping' figure. And I realize, I have hurt him. "Never mind." I say, softly. "Come on Sammy." Sam exchanges a look with Dean, then puts on his jacket and follows me out of the hotel. "Hey, Alex... are we alright?" Asks Sam. "Yeah, Sam, we are good." I say, before pulling him into a hug. "I'm sorry I was such a bitch." I mutter. "You weren't... I left you. For a long time, I'm sorry." Says Sam. "Its alright. I love ya, Sammy." I say, letting go of him. "I love you, too. Are we alright now, Alex?" He asks. "Yeah." I reply. 


End file.
